Accidents
by godsdaughter77
Summary: John gets in an accident and conflict ensues. John and Rodney both get whumped and its set during the time Elizabeth and Carson still inhabit Atlantis.
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I do not own Stargate Atlantis and no infringement was intended, just having some fun with the characters

Spoiler Alert: No Spoilers

Summary: John gets in an accident and conflict ensues. John and Rodney both get whumped and its set during the time Elizabeth and Carson still inhabit Atlantis.

Beta: Isobel Kelte

Accidents

It was a complete accident. Of course, everyone else automatically assumed he had been doing something he shouldn't. John himself was the first to admit the circumstances were suspicious, but still he hadn't been doing something he shouldn't have been doing.

He had been teaching some of the new arrivals from the Daedalus how to fly the puddle jumpers. He had them practice landing the jumpers on one of the piers on the city. Lorne had been helping, and everyone was enjoying themselves, though they made sure that everyone followed proper protocol.

Sheppard decided to have Lorne and himself demonstrate some more complicated maneuvers for the recruits to show them what the puddle jumpers were capable of. So, Sheppard was alone in Jumper One, while Lorne was in Jumper Five. It started out according to plan, but…well…do things ever end according to plan? They had shown their moves over the skies of Atlantis, and a bunch of people were out watching them, besides the recruits they were training.

The event had a sort of air show quality about it, and if Sheppard and Lorne had shown off a little more than necessary, who could blame them? They had just finished their stunts and were coming in for a landing. Both were diving, having every intention of smoothly pulling out of the dive with more than enough time to land on the deck.

However, Sheppard's jumper started speeding up. He tried to slow it down, but it continued to gain in speed. With a monumental effort he managed to pull it out of the dive just before it would have hit the pier, but the jumper was not fully responding to Sheppard's commands, so it hurtled out of control into the side of a building on Atlantis. The crash was not nearly as bad as it could have been, but the resulting horrendous noise bore witness to how bad it still was.

John had been stunned by the crash, and felt bruised all over, but by the time everyone reached his jumper he had pulled himself together and lowered the ramp.

As he stepped out he saw that a great deal of people were approaching him in a hurry, and near the front of the pack was Elizabeth.

She gave him a quick onceover, and seeing that he appeared all right in a voice that was tight with anger, she said, "What where you thinking!"

"…Huh?" he asked, still not firing on all cylinders because of the crash.

"You choose to show off to everyone by racing Lorne down, when you should be setting a good example on the responsibility needed in flying puddle jumpers, and in that showing off you crash the jumper into the city, and then you ask me 'huh'!"

John had not seen Elizabeth that mad in a long time, and realized that a lot of people were watching as she chastised him. He felt a hint of embarrassment, and straightened himself up as if standing at attention.

"I was not trying to race Lorne down. Something happened to the controls and they refused to respond to my commands."

Elizabeth gave him a look of complete incredulity.

She opened her mouth and then shut it clearly holding in some angry retort. Taking a deep breath she said, "Why don't we speak in my office, Colonel?"

"That would be fine, Dr. Weir," responded Sheppard in an equally calm voice that belayed the underling anger.

Not wanting to make a scene…besides, you know, crashing the jumper…he made his way to her office. Everyone could tell that she was as mad as a hornet, and John felt frustrated by it all.

When they reached the office, John stood at attention, waiting for Elizabeth to speak. Though usually they were able to mesh their dual roles of friends and commanders, there were times when those roles just conflicted. Apparently, this was going to be one of those times.

"John, you promised me when I agreed to this that neither you, or Lorne, or any of the other pilots would do anything dangerous or foolish. I even let you and Lorne do the crazy stunts, because I trusted you to know both your own limits and the limits of your jumper. So, how do you explain crashing one of the jumpers, which we can't get more of when they break I might add, into the city?"

In a tightly controlled voice he said, "I told you. The controls weren't responding to my commands to slow down and pull up. I did agree to your terms, and I followed them. It's not my fault the jumper wasn't responding."

"John, do you seriously expect me to believe that after managing all sorts of intricate and complicated moves, all of a sudden they didn't respond, right when you were getting the chance to race against Lorne?"

Tightlipped, John said, "Yes."

"John, I'd like to believe you, but it just doesn't add up. You two have been joking about which is the faster pilot for weeks now, and here was a perfect chance to prove it, yet I had asked you specifically not to do that. I didn't want anyone to get the impression that these jumpers are play toys."

"Which is why I didn't do it. Honestly, Elizabeth, something happened with the controls."

"Fine. If that is what you want me to believe," she said in a way that clearly said she didn't believe him.

"Is that all, Dr. Weir?" Sheppard asked while still standing at attention.

Sighing and rubbing her forehead, Elizabeth nodded.

"Then may I be dismissed?" he asked in the same calm, detached voice.

"John…I…" Seeing his expression she cut herself off and said, "Yes."

John did a perfect about turn, and stopped just short of marching out of the office.

After he left, Elizabeth felt like throwing something at the now closed door in frustration. She knew that she shouldn't have dealt with John the way she just had, but she had been so terrified when the jumper had careened to the deck, and then crashed into the city. For a moment, she had been sure that he was dead. Then when she saw he wasn't she had let her anger engulf her to hide her fear. How could he have risked his life just to beat Lorne in a race? She needed him here; everyone in the city needed him. The idea that he had almost died due to a stupid, childish competition with Lorne had her seeing fire.

She had been too angry to listen to his explanation of the jumper controls. Besides, it really didn't make sense that they had failed at that particular point. Though, she now acknowledged that it also didn't make complete sense that John, who had always had no difficulties in controlling the jumper before, had problems now.

It was just a big fumbled mess and Elizabeth just wanted it all to be over. Sighing she turned on her radio. "Rodney, I'm sure that you already are figuring out what damage was done to the jumper, but can you also figure out if there was anything done to the controls?"

...

John made his way to his quarters. He had no intention of talking with anyone right then. He was angry, frustrated, and he admitted to himself silently to himself, in a bit of pain. Yet he was way too mad to visit the infirmary. He knew presently everyone was probably gossiping about what had happened, and he really didn't want to give anything else for them to say.

Besides, he still couldn't get over the fact that Elizabeth didn't believe him. True, the circumstances were suspicious, but still. Reaching his quarters, he mentally locked his door and told Atlantis that under no circumstances was anyone to get in.

Once that was done, he slowly unbuttoned his uniform shirt and slipped it off. He had banged his left arm pretty hard against the consol of the jumper, and now it didn't want to help him unbutton the shirt, but he preserved despite an occasional hiss of pain and carefully began removing his undershirt. It hurt incredibly, and as he finally completely slipped the shirt off and saw his chest he realized why.

Even in the short time since the crash it was already covered in dark bruises. He knew that he had banged himself up pretty bad, but he hadn't even considered that it was this bad…maybe he should see a doctor and just get it checked over to be on the safe side…?

No. He was definitely taking a shower before he did anything else. John was almost positive that there would be no reason for him to need to stay in the infirmary, but there was no way he was going to risk a doctor getting their hands on him before he got the shower his body craved even more then Tylenol.

John felt much better after the shower and realized that all it now craved was sleep. It was only about seven at night, but the idea of getting rest was unbelievably appealing.

If he went to the infirmary, he would be poked and prodded, and John knew that he was only badly bruised. There was nothing that a doctor could do, really, besides giving him painkillers, and he still had some left from his last injury. So, he just decided to rest for a bit. He'd get it checked out tomorrow when he wasn't as tired. A little extra time before facing the pain an examination would entail wouldn't hurt anything.

Thankfully, Carson was not on Atlantis right now as he was with Ronon and Teyla, visiting the Anthosians. John knew that if Carson had been on Atlantis, he would have already hauled John down to the infirmary for a thorough exam. However, as luck would have it, Carson wasn't supposed to arrive until tomorrow, and now John had every intention of resting peacefully in his own quarters.

Content with his decision, John climbed into bed and dimmed the lights.

...

Rodney glared defiantly at the readout in front of him and wished that one of his lowly minions were still there so he could yell at them to help relieve his frustration. Yet all of them had left him hours ago to sleep, and it was just a bit too early for the early-rising scientists to arrive. This left Rodney alone, with the wreck of a jumper, no sleep, and surviving on artificial stimulant alone.

Not to mention the fact he had a horrible headache from the awful sound of the jumper slamming into Atlantis. As he told himself firmly, the headache would have nothing to do with staring at a computer screen for hours trying to figure out just how broken John's favorite jumper was while forcing himself not to think about the way his heart had stopped, certain that John's luck had run out when said sound occurred.

Rodney knew he should probably go to bed and get a fresh start later, but with the strain between Elizabeth and John over the crash, he couldn't stop. Each of them had been there for him in the past, and he felt it was his duty to try and relieve the stress between them. Thus, if he could just find a viable reason for why the controls malfunctioned there could be peace once again in Rodney's world—well at least a little more peace.

So, Rodney turned his mind firmly away from thoughts of his bed, took another large swallow of coffee, and clicked on another screen hoping that this time he would find the glitch that would prove John correct in his assessment of what had happened to the jumper.

...

To Be Continued

A/N: Thanks for reading! PLEASE review and let me know what you think! I should be updating at least once a week. Again, PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE review!


	2. Chapter 2

A/N: OH MY GOSH! You reviewers are amazing! Thanks so much! Also, those of you who put me on either story alert or author alert totally made me smile! :D Hope you enjoy!

The next morning John awoke feeling like he had gotten in a bar fight and lost…badly. His side was killing him, and he hated how sluggish he felt. However, as soon as he glanced at the clock, and realized he was almost late for meeting with Elizabeth, he forced his sore and bruised body into overtime.

John and Elizabeth tried to meet together every morning to discuss what was happening both on Atlantis and off world. Usually, John enjoyed the meetings as they gave him and Elizabeth a chance to not only catch up on everything that was happening without reading tons of reports, but it also allowed them an opportunity to share the burden of running the massive city they called home.

Yet, this time the idea of being stuck in a room with Elizabeth were he was sure they would again go over what had happened yesterday made his stomach twist. He remembered how awkward it had been after he had chosen to go against her orders when the city had been quarantined because of the nanite virus in their first year on Atlantis. However, this time he knew it would be ten times worse. Elizabeth didn't believe him. She had barely even given him a chance to explain himself. She had simply jumped down his throat over it, which sadly was an experience he had had all too frequently from other people throughout his life, though he had never thought she would do it.

Growing up, his dad would often do that. He'd jump to conclusions about what John had been doing, until John got to the point he wouldn't even try to explain what had truly happened, instead he'd just accept whatever reprimand his father dished out on him.

Some of his previous commanding officers would do the same thing. He remembered the first one he had had. The man had thought John wanted special treatment because of who his father was. He didn't like that idea and gave John a harder time than any of the other men under his command instead, never believing anything John said. John had gotten used to both his behavior and the behavior of others just like him.

Except this was Elizabeth! They had worked closely together for so long he had thought she would believe him when it came down to the line, but instead she hadn't. She had immediately assumed John disobeyed her direct orders, was irresponsible with the jumpers and was an incompetent pilot!

Frustrated again as he thought about the injustice of it all, John wished he could spar in the gym. Instead, he was stuck going to meet with Elizabeth. Though as he left his room and headed to the mess hall to grab something to eat, he grumpily admitted to himself that his body was probably not up for a sparring session no matter how much he wished it was. The bruises on his body felt like they had bruises and he had to force himself not to walk stiffly down the hall.

He grabbed a muffin and a cup of coffee quickly in the mess hall trying to ignore the glances that kept being sent his way. Atlantis was such a small city it was next to impossible to keep things a secret and his contention with Elizabeth had been far from under the radar. He was leaving the room quickly when he saw a grumpy and bleary-eye head of science.

"Rodney did you find out why the controls were out of whack?" John asked knowing from simply glancing at him that he had stayed up all night working on it.

"No." said the clearly displeased Rodney. "I stayed up all night and only discovered what I already knew, the Jumper will be out of commission for weeks and only a great deal of hours put into it by me will ever get it working again. Furthermore, I didn't discover a single flaw with the controls so far, which by the way, I had to tell Elizabeth this morning."

"Yeah, well there was something wrong with them, Rodney," John insisted even as his stomach sunk lower at the lack of support from the physical evidence, forcing him to say, "Please keep looking, Rodney. They just stopped working all of a sudden sort of like they did when we crashed on the planet with all the kids."

Rodney gave a long suffering sigh, but, though out of sorts by everything, couldn't deny the pleading in his friend's voice. "I'll keep looking."

"Thanks Rodney, but wait until AFTER you get some sleep. You look like you were hit by a truck," John commented as he examined shadows under Rodney's bloodshot eyes and his overall rumpled appearance.

"I'll have you know the only person who was in any sort of crash was you! But…yeah…maybe I will get some sleep in an hour or two. There are just a few more things I want to check first. Good luck with Elizabeth by the way."

Sighing deeply at the reminder of Elizabeth and his contention, John left Rodney with his large cup of coffee and made his way to her office. He wanted to force Rodney to get some sleep immediately, but he knew it would be an uphill battle presently and he didn't feel up to the fight. Rodney was always almost impossible to get to sleep when he was working on something and his admittance of thinking about getting sleep an in hour or two was the best John was going to get right now. Plus, John had no intention of giving Elizabeth another reason to be upset with him, and he was already risking being late to the meeting as it was.

Slightly out of breath he managed to make it to her office not a moment too soon and sat carefully in the chair before her desk. He sat as straight and rigid as he could with his aching torso, trying to look professional and aloof, and waited for Elizabeth to begin. Taking a deep breath she did.

"John, I'm sorry for the way I reacted yesterday about the crash. I should not have dealt with it in that way and in front of everyone else; however, that being said, I need you to tell me the truth. Rodney informed me this morning that he found no evidence of the controls malfunctioning. He is still looking, but John; it is looking less and less likely that something will be found,"

John nodded at all this knowing from Elizabeth's tone she was about to jump to her main point and braced for impact. "Do you stand by your story that it was the controls mal-functioning not you deciding to race Lorne in landing that were responsible for the crash?"

"Yes, Elizabeth, I do stand by that," John said in a firm voice that showed how calm and separated he was choosing to remain. After all the practice he had had in this area, he had it down to an art, though he had to say, except for his father, it had never hurt this much before.

Firmly, John chose not to think about it and pushed the thought away even as the cynical part of his mind rejoiced as it was proven right that when it came down to it, no one, not even Elizabeth, who he had thought trusted him, would believe his side. He thought things were different on Atlantis, but except for with his team, John realized that just wasn't the case.

Elizabeth remained silent after John's answer, and John wondered what she was thinking behind the negotiator's mask she had clad herself with. In fact, the mask itself seemed to taunt him with the fact she didn't look at him as a friend currently. How quickly everything seemed to change. One second, he had felt on top of the world with everything he could ask for in a job; the next he was reminded of how easy it was for people to turn on someone. John just couldn't get past the fact she didn't believe him. He understood that it looked really suspicious, but still…

Finally, Elizabeth began to speak again.

………………………………………………………………………………………………………

Elizabeth, who had gotten little sleep the night before, because of worrying over the crash and the fallout from it, had watched with concern as John entered her office breathing heavily and moving gingerly as if his torso was bothering him. She had immediately felt concern for him, and wondered if he had been more hurt than she had thought in the crash. Yet, a glance at his face showed her clearly he would not be receptive to any questions about his health and she still was miffed about the fact she was pretty sure he wasn't telling her the truth. So, she had pushed her concern away and plunged into the topic weighing heavily on her mind hoping that discussing it would help to clear the air.

The safety of Atlantis and the people on it were her responsibility and John's stunt with Lorne not only risked his own life, but also set a bad example for the others on Atlantis. If the second in command of the Atlantis expedition showed a cavalier attitude towards the Ancient artifacts they had found on Atlantis and ignored the dangers of them, then many others, not just military, would follow his example, which would increase the risk a tenfold of both damage to irreplaceable devices and injuries of valuable personnel.

Not to mention the fact, Elizabeth couldn't believe that John was risking their friendship and the command relationship they had established over this. She had spoken with him at least a dozen times before the 'demonstration' to make sure he knew how important it was to her that he and any other pilots did not show off. He had agreed with her and told her he fully supported her in this. Yet, then he had gone off and raced Lorne and lied to her about it! The betrayal of that was what made Elizabeth push away the unease she felt at how John looked and press forward, stopping just short of outright calling him a liar.

However, when John had said that he stood by his story that the controls had malfunctioned in a tone that was detached from himself, Elizabeth suddenly had realized how this must be from John's side of the table. Here he was on Atlantis facing up to his 'boss' in the same way she was sure he had had to face many commanding officers in the past. As Elizabeth had gotten to know John, she had always thought that those commanding officers had misjudged him, and not fully listened to John's side of the story. Even though John never talked about his previous troubles with COs, there were times in certain situations when he'd get a certain look in his eyes and she knew he was relieving some of the pain and frustration from those experiences.

Elizabeth realized with sudden clarity and a sinking feeling in her gut that she was doing what she had looked down at others for doing; getting locked up in her own way of thinking and refusing to accept what anyone else said or believed. As a negotiator it was something that drove her insane at times, yet she had been doing that to John, refusing to listen to his explanation despite the trust that had built between the two of them during their time on Atlantis.

Yeah, it did look fishy, and Rodney still did not think he would find anything, but John though under her command was also her friend, and he had never lied to her before. The few times he had made a mistake in the past he had always owned up to it, and it didn't make sense that he wouldn't do the same now.

Sighing Elizabeth realized that from the beginning her thinking had been flawed. She had been so upset that John had almost died _again_ that she had allowed anger to come to the surface to cover the fear that had still caused her heart to pound. Also, she had used the event as a reason to release suppressed irritation at John for not considering his own safety. She had been like a kettle of boiling water, and the crash had been like the lid being lifted from her allowing all her inward steam to escape and burn anyone in its path. She had viewed the crash as a perfect way to get him to see reason, and to take more precautions when it came to his own health and safety, but she now recognized that hadn't been the right or smartest move she could have made. Though it looked like John was lying, she had to give him the benefit of the doubt and trust him. After all, she had often asked him to do the same for her, and after the nanite incident he had done so, even at times when she could tell he disagreed with her assessment of the situation. The least she could do was give him the same respect and consideration. She just hoped he'd forgive her for refusing to do that from the beginning.

Taking a deep breath she said "John…"—and then the alarms went off.

...

To be continued

A/N: Please review and let me know what you like, dislike, think I could improve on, or just that you read it...PLEASE! After all, the more reviews I get the guiltier I feel for not updating sooner... ;)


	3. Chapter 3

A/N: Wonderful Reviewers and Readers, I did feel guilty all this week for not updating sooner… However, I decided to wait a bit longer in updating, so I could give you a longer and better chapter! I hope you enjoy!

**Chapter 3**

The second the alarms went off Sheppard was out of his chair and off to the control room thankful that adrenalin helped mask the pain his speed caused. "Chuck, what's wrong?"

"I don't know sir! There was a sudden power spike in one of the uninhabited sections of the city and then the alarms went off! I can't figure out why the city is reacting the way it is!"

"Can you pinpoint were the spike was?"

"Yes, sir! It was right here!" Chuck said as he pointed to a room on the Northwest part of the city.

"Alright, keep trying to figure out what it is."

John radioed Rodney to meet up with him at the lab, even as he began to jog towards it himself. Though he knew Rodney was tired, he also knew Rodney was still awake and that he was the best person to have on any ancient problem. Not to mention the fact, if John called Zelenka instead of him, Rodney wouldn't talk to him for weeks.

"Rodney, there was a powerspike and I need you to head over to a lab to help me check it out."

"Yes, yes, yes, I already know about it and am on my way. I should be there shortly as I'm in that section of the city."

"Great, I'll meet you there!"

Almost before Rodney finished acknowledging him, he was radioing Lorne and told him to get a team of marines and to head out to that position. After all the creepy and dangerous things they had discovered on Atlantis since arriving, John wanted to err on the side of caution and have backup already on its way.

As John pressed the section of the city he wanted to go to in the transporter, he gave a passing thought to how of all the ways he thought his conversation with Weir would end; this certainly wasn't it.

Though, he wasn't about to complain. He was glad to have been able to get out of there before Elizabeth could tell him outright she didn't trust him. Not that her actions didn't already show her lack of trust, but without her saying the words, John felt like he could live under the delusion that deep down she might believe him.

John almost laughed bitterly at the thought. Of course, she didn't believe him. When it came down to it the only people who ever seemed to believe him was his team. Thinking of his team helped ease the ache Elizabeth had caused; however, as he reached the lab he pushed all those thoughts out of his mind and focused on what could have caused the power spike.

………………………………………………………………………………………………

As Rodney quickly made his way to John's position, his glare, which was worse than even a few hours ago, showed how horrible Rodney's day, had been going so far. Yet, considering all that had happened, he felt fully justified in his frustration.

He had found nothing wrong with the jumper, even though he had stayed up all night trying to find a reason, besides pilot error, for why it had crashed the day before, making him think for a moment that he had lost one of his best friends. Plus, the tension between Sheppard and Weir hadn't abated at all over night and Rodney knew it was going to get worse as he was convinced there wasn't anything wrong with the jumper's controls. Leaving Rodney wondering what he could do to fix a seemingly unfixable situation.

Rodney did great with machines, technology, formulas…but people—well people were next to impossible for him to figure out. A fact that made him not even try for years. Yet, now here he was with friends that he considered a surrogate family, and him stuck between them feeling like there was absolutely nothing he could to make that tension go away.

Rodney's thoughts were interrupted when he finally reached the lab. He saw that Lorne and the marines hadn't reached it yet, which wasn't too surprising as it always took a few minutes for them to get ready. However, it was also no surprise for him to see Sheppard had already not only reached the lab, but had already entered it and was looking around for any dangers.

The lab looked identical to most of the labs on Atlantis; except for this one seemed to have experienced a recent explosion or something. It looked almost like parts of the room had been struck with lightening and Rodney shifted his feet nervously waiting for John to declare it safe for him to enter.

When John finally waved him in, Rodney went directly to the central consol in the room to determine what had caused the power spike. He tried to activate it, but it refused so he snapped his fingers and pointed at it.

Sheppard gave a long suffering sigh and placed his hand upon the consol. Immediately it lit up brightly and Rodney felt like patting John on the head and saying good boy. He didn't though—he was a genius after all.

As readouts began to flash across the screen Rodney smiled. This was something he could handle. It was his element and soon his thoughts were consumed by the wonderful world of 0s and 1s instead of trying to understand the true complexity of human interactions.

………………………………………………………………………………………………

It had taken a few minutes for Lorne to get a team of marines ready, but he was now on his way towards a transporter with them, so he could get to the lab to provide backup for Sheppard; a job he was extremely used to.

With every step he took, his mind contemplated what it had been considering since yesterday, how close he came to losing his CO. He had almost lost him many times before, but this was one of those times that gave an extra shock to it, since it wasn't while doing anything dangerous. They had been having some fun training new recruits in the safety of Atlantis. There were no angry natives, vengeful enemies, rabid monsters, haywire technology, or uncontrolled natural elements. There was no reason that Sheppard should have almost died.

Though Lorne had worked under many fine officers, there was no doubt about it, Colonel Sheppard was the one he was the most honored to have served under. He had never been under a commanding officer as inspiring as Sheppard was. Many men under Colonel Sheppard's command truly believed that Sheppard could do anything; for obvious reasons. He and his team pulled off the impossible with plans that seemed ridiculous—until they were pulled off. Of course, many times they still seemed ridiculous, but the results were hard to argue with.

Lorne even found himself falling into the trap of believing Sheppard could do anything and was untouchable. Still, being stuck in command while Sheppard was laid up in the infirmary under strict orders to not even think about work was an all too frequent reminder of the fact he wasn't invincible.

The many close calls were another such reminder; from Lorne's first real mission with Sheppard were Sheppard had gotten captured while trying to track down Ford to yesterday were John's jumper hurtled to the ground picking up speed as it went. A pilot himself, Lorne knew the skill it had taken for Sheppard to pull out of that dive and though crashing, doing it in such a way that he survived.

Which was probably part of the reason, he had wanted to bash in the heads of two, obviously new scientists, as no one else would be stupid enough to say what Lorne overheard them say at breakfast that morning.

"So, did you here the latest news on the jumper crash?"

"Yeah, apparently even though Dr. McKay spent all night on it, there isn't any sign of a malfunction."

"I personally believe it has to have been pilot error. It's clear he was showing off and then lost control of the jumper."

"Definitely, I don't understand why everyone isn't accepting that the great and mighty Colonel Sheppard isn't infallible. Though at least Dr. Weir isn't simply accepting his word for it and looking into it."

"I heard from one of the marines who came over on the Daedalus with us that she looked just short of furious when he stepped out of the wrecked jumper."

"True, but most people on Atlantis seem to be in awe of the Colonel and won't even listen to you pointing out that he could have made a mistake."

"Well, according to all the stories he has done some pretty amazing things and risked his life to save the city numerous times."

"Yes, but most of those stories are probably exaggerated or simply not true. No one could pull off everything they say Colonel Sheppard has. Come on think about it. They claim that before the Daedalus showed up the first time, he had flown a nuclear device into a hive ship. I mean seriously, do you really anyone would actually do that? Or what about how he supposedly took out over 60 enemy soldiers, on his own, while they were trying to take over Atlantis! Then there's..."

"Hey! I agree with you! I don't see how any one man could do all that either, but whether he has or not, he certainly has won the respect and loyalty of almost everyone on Atlantis."

"That doesn't mean he deserves it."

"No, it doesn't and whether he deserves the loyalty isn't my main point. I just think that everyone shouldn't put him on a pedestal. The simplest explanation for the crash is pilot error and usually the simplest explanation is the right one. Though, it seems not many of the expedition members are even willing to contemplate the idea of him being at fault."

"Exactly—oh great, I'm almost late. I have to go, but I'll talk with you later."

As the scientist had rushed out of the room, Lorne had forced himself to remain seated at the table instead of rushing towards either one of the men and _explaining_ the error in their thinking and how all the stories about Colonel Sheppard were true and that Sheppard would never show off in that way.

Lorne and Sheppard had talked in length before the training session, and Sheppard had made it clear that though they could have some fun, they weren't to do any moves that were too tricky or dangerous. Lorne knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that Sheppard wouldn't have gone back on that.

Lorne had wanted to tell those two scientists exactly how great a commanding officer Colonel Sheppard was. Nevertheless, from past experience, Lorne knew Colonel Sheppard accepted the doubts some of the new personnel always had about him, and wouldn't want Lorne to do anything about it. Sheppard figured that either they would come to like him or they wouldn't and it really didn't matter which one. In fact, he seemed to think they were even slightly justified in their doubts, though Lorne tried to tell him otherwise. Sure, Colonel Sheppard wasn't perfect, but Lorne firmly believed he had done better than any other commander could have done in his position.

Besides, and at this thought Lorne suppressed an evil smirk, instead of explaining things himself to these hapless scientists he would just have to let Dr. McKay and Dr. Zelenka know about the conversation and then wait for the results. He was sure they would be entertaining and extremely satisfying.

"Sir," Lorne turned his attention to the marine in front of him. "The transporter's door isn't opening."

"What?"

"The door refuses to open, sir."

"Control tower, this is Lorne, do you know why the transporter's door isn't opening?"

"No, sir, but the city seems to have locked down all the transporters."

"Keep working on it."

"Yes, sir."

"Great" he muttered before tapping his radio again, "Colonel Sheppard, this is Lorne. For some reason the transporter isn't working and we have to go the long way to get to you."

"Understood Major. Just get here as soon as you can."

"Will do, sir."

Lorne clicked off the radio and sighed.

"It's going to take us at least an hour to get there without the transporters, sir."

"I know, we'll just have to double time it and hope they don't need us until we get there," but Lorne wondered as he said it if it was even possible for McKay and Sheppard not to get in trouble in that time.

………………………………………………………………………………………………

Carson's day had started early as he, Ronon and Teyla packed up their supplies to get back to Atlantis. They had originally planned on having a special meal with the Anthosians before they actually left, but while packing Ronon had cut his arm. It was serious enough to require stitches, but Ronon, of course, was all for staying until after they ate—for multiple reasons.

Carson, however, was firm in his desire to get it cleaned, disinfected, stitched, and antibiotics in Ronon as soon as possible to decrease the chance of infection. Though sad at the idea of not spending more time with her people, Teyla was in complete agreement and threatened Ronon if he didn't agree to leave right away. So, they had arrived back on Atlantis several hours earlier than expected.

Teyla went to rest in her quarters, since she had stayed up late in the night talking with Halin, while Carson hauled Ronon off to the infirmary to treat his arm. Not long after he began, Carson and Ronon were being updated on all the news on Atlantis.

"Well," explained the nurse helping Carson, "No one is certain what caused the crash. Though of course there are countless theories. Of those many theories there are two main camps. The one is that it's Sheppard's fault the jumper crashed and he had been racing Lorne down and lost control of the jumper. The other, which is held by almost all of the military, is that the jumper malfunctioned."

"Sheppard would never lose control of the jumper."

"Many would agree with you, Ronon. However, apparently Elizabeth isn't so sure if all the rumors are correct."

"She didn' believe John?"

"Nothings for sure, but there is definite tension between them."

Carson sighed deeply then asked, "Was John hurt at all in the crash, no wait let me rephrase that, how badly was he hurt?"

"Honestly, we don't know. He was able to walk out of the jumper without any trouble and he never stopped by to see us."

"Of course, he didn'," Carson sighed again while Ronon grinned. Seeing this Carson said in frustration, "Don' ye start! The pair of ye need ta learn ta come ta see me when yer injured—preferably _before_ I need ta operate!"

Ronon didn't lose the grin at all and Carson shook his head in resignation. No matter how much he tried to get across to the two…blockheads, otherwise known as John and Ronon, the importance of letting him know when they were hurt or feeling sick, it usually took detective work or a serious problem for him to find out anything about their health.

"I suppose when I'm done with yer arm, I'll have ta go and hunt him down."

Whatever Ronon was about to say in response was abruptly cut off as the city's alarms went off.

Carson stood still, his heart pounding waiting for a call saying there was a medical emergency, an occurrence that happened all too often. When a minute passed and he still heard nothing, he called the control tower. They assured him that there weren't any medical emergencies and Carson had felt some relief, especially when the alarms were silenced a minute later.

He turned back to Ronon and decided he should finish up his arm as quickly as possible, just in case things changed. He had just finished when he got a call from Elizabeth.

"Carson, would you mind heading down to a lab? I'm afraid you'll have to walk as the transporters aren't working?"

"Of course. Are there injuries?"

"No, but it's a bit of a walk to get to that section and John and Rodney are in the lab alone right now. With their record I'd rather be on the safe side and make sure if something does happen medical personnel will already be on their way.

"Understood, I'll be on my way in a moment."

"I've just notified Lorne and the marines who are with him to stop by the infirmary to escort you and your team there as it's only a slight deviation from their path."

"Alright, Elizabeth."

Ronon had already hopped off his bed by the time Carson had turned to some of his personnel for them to get ready for whatever they might find at the lab. Though Carson hoped that Elizabeth was simply being over prepared he wasn't about to bet on it. Not with Rodney and John's luck.

It took Carson's team only a moment to gather any supplies they might need; and Carson smiled at their efficiency. Ronon twirled his ever present blaster in his hands ensuring that it was ready for anything and Carson didn't have to ask if he was planning on coming along. Part of his team was in an unknown and possibly dangerous situation, of course he was coming.

Lorne and his team arrived at the infirmary a moment later and soon they were all on their way to the lab hoping that this trip would be for nothing.

………………………………………………………………………………………………

As Rodney worked, John leaned back against the wall. His left shoulder was really aching and Sheppard was confused by it as that was one of the few parts of his body that hadn't been rammed into something when the jumper crashed. Though if he was honest to himself, he realized the rest of his body hadn't appreciated his running to the lab either. Go figure.

In fact, he was even beginning to debate on going to the infirmary to get it checked out after this crisis was taken care of. He just hoped that Carson still wouldn't be back yet when he did get checked out as he knew he would hear an ear full; not that Carson wouldn't find out anyway. John was convinced that Carson checked his file all the time just to make sure John couldn't get away with anything.

John sighed and shifted slightly to relieve the dull pain in his side. He just wanted this to be over and to stretch out on his bed.

"Rodney have you figured this out at all yet?"

"It's been like 5 minutes Colonel. Really, even a genius like me needs time to figure out what's wrong."

"It's been 20 McKay and just keep working as fast as you can."

Shifting again John bit his lip at the pain it caused and allowed his eyes to wander the room to distract himself. He noticed that in the far corner a smaller consol was giving off a faint humming sound a sound that as he thought about it had been gaining in strength since they arrived.

"Rodney," he said as he approached the consol and it felt like the very air around him was charged as if a in a thunderstorm. His skin began to tingle and he realized that there were slight discharges from the consol and he quickly stepped back. "I think I know were the power surge came from and it might be best if we get out of here."

"Wait a moment, I'm getting some readings."

John nodded as he licked his lips and listened to the increasing hum, a hum that had never been followed by something pleasant in John's experience.

John was proven correct as Rodney cried out, "It's going to explode! Come over here and try to power off the consol!"

Immediately John ran over there and desperately thought off at the device as Rodney frantically trying to avert disaster beside him. Yet, it was no use and John heard the hum grow louder and louder.

Giving up on the useless task John grabbed Rodney's arm and said "We need to get out of here!" Rodney clutched his computer to his chest as John began to pull and shove the scientist towards the door.

They were almost there when the humming reached a crescendo and John heard the crackling of lightning and heard the sound of something exploding. A sudden force shoved him and Rodney impacting them against a wall of the lab. John experienced an intense burst of pain in his side just before the worlds turned to black.

………………………………………………………………………………………………

To Be Continued

A/N: So, I have to tell all some mixed bad and good news. I am going to have to put more time between my updates, but when I do update it should be a longer and MUCH better chapter you will get to read, so please be patient with me, real life is extremely active right now… That being said, please continue to review as it inspires me to tell real life to go away and I go and work on this story instead ;-)

A/N 2: By the way dear anonymous readers I really appreciate your comments and wish I had time to reply to each of you individually. Thank you SO MUCH for reviewing!


	4. Chapter 4

A/N: Thank you so much for all the reviews! I appreciate each one and they really do inspire me to keep writing! I hope you enjoy the chapter!

Rodney awoke suddenly as he felt his body trying to expel a lung in a violent coughing fit. He struggled to catch his breath and continue breathing despite the intense pain in his left arm. When he had finally caught his breath he cautiously opened his eyes and was greeted by a dim and fuzzy world as he had a difficult time focusing. He gently shook his head to clear his vision and then gasped in pain as he realized what a mistake that was. He felt like an entire high school band was practicing in his head and he wished he could tell them to shut up.

He glanced around the room in confusion and tried to figure out what in the Pegasus galaxy had happened. After a moment, his blurry vision registered a slumped figure against the wall beside him. It all came back in a rush and Rodney rasped out "John" and shook the still figure beside him with the arm that wasn't making him wish it wasn't attached to his body.

Fear filled Rodney when the only response he received was a hoarse moan of pain. He looked around desperately as if Carson would magically appear at his need and realized with horror that the same humming sound that had preceded the explosion had started again and was increasing in intensity.

"Don't panic, don't panic!" he muttered to himself as he knew he needed to think clearly to get them both out of the lab that had already exploded once and he was sure was going to explode again. He knew John would be no help, so Rodney simply grabbed the back of John's shirt with his one good hand and started to haul him out of the lab.

He wished that he didn't have to worry about another power discharge, as not to mention the pain trying to move John caused him, He was terrified he was making John's injuries worse. Though he forcefully reminded himself that in all the first aid classes he had ever taken they always pointed out that if there was life-threatening danger it was okay to move the individual.

Thankfully, they were already close to the door and Rodney soon had John safely outside of the lab. He then gently laid John down for a moment while, with difficulty, as he could only use one hand, he shut the lab door in hopes that it would prevent them from being further affected by the second explosion he was sure was inevitable.

Rodney once again grabbed the back of John's shirt and managed to drag him about 12 feet farther from door when he collapsed exhausted on his back desperately trying to pull oxygen into his starved lungs while black spots danced in front of him obscuring his vision.

Abruptly, a loud explosion shook the corridor and Rodney cradled his agonizing arm to his chest, thankful he had gotten John and himself farther away from the lab. Resisting the almost overwhelming urge to simply close his eyes and rest, Rodney rolled over on to his knees and knelt beside his friend quickly appraising John for the bloody injuries he knew must be there. Yet, to his surprise there wasn't any gushing blood.

Only small scrapes that didn't explain the weak, but rapid pulse John had, the moist, cold skin, or the shallow breathing. Shock…Rodney's thumping brain supplied, but it still didn't explain why.

"Okay" he muttered to himself, "I need to get him warm—warm, I can do warm." Carefully Rodney took off his jacket. He wanted to scream as he pulled it off of his broken arm, but he persevered and gently covered John with it, hoping that it would help to stop the shivering that had begun.

"Come on John wake up" he urged while waiting for Lorne to arrive with a working radio, so a medical team could be called. After what seemed like an eternity, he was rewarded with fluttering eyelids as John slowly returned to consciousness. "Hey, John. That's it. Just open your eyes. You can do it!"

Pain filled dazed hazel eyes locked with his causing some of the relief Rodney had had to see John awake dissipate as he saw that John was having a hard time focusing.

"Hey focus on me buddy. I need you to tell me what hurts."

"Hmmmmm…everything…"

"Okay, ummmm….honesty is good, but…can you be a little bit more specific in what hurts the most?" questioned Rodney as he tried to push down his panic.

"My left…side…"

Nodding, Rodney gently lifted John's shirt to see the offending area. When it came into view, Rodney couldn't contain the word 'shit' as it slipped out of his mouth.

"That…bad…huh?"

"It's fine, John…uhhhh…nothing to worry about."

"Sure…but…you only…say John…when you…want something…or are…really…worried…" he gasped.

"That's ridiculous Jo…" Rodney cut off abruptly at John's raised eyebrow and went back to looking at John's side; a side that was definitely a cause for worry. It was dark with purple and blue bruises and even Rodney was able to tell that there had to be internal bleeding.

Suddenly Rodney was taken from his perusal of John's wounds and a feeling of utter inadequacy, a feeling he despised, by the arrival of Lorne, the other marines, and to Rodney's shock, Ronon, Carson and a few of his voodoo priests.

"Thank God!" Rodney said, slowly backed away giving Carson room. "Wait! How did you know to come and I thought you weren't supposed to be back for hours?" he questioned as Carson knelt beside John and began to asses his condition.

"Well Elizabeth figured after the transporters stopped working that considering it was ye two, and that yer both proper trouble magnets, it'd be best if there was medical personnel already on their way. So, we met up with Lorne and the others ta get here as quickly as bloody possible. And in answer to yer other question we came back early. Now stop giving the medic a hard time and let him look at your arm as it's clearly broken."

"Fine" muttered Rodney as the medic pulled him still farther away from John's form. Still, Rodney's eyes never left were Carson and some others were carefully working around John and loading him onto a gurney. Just before Carson was about to rush John out of the corridor, Rodney asked with worry "Carson he's going to be okay, right?"

Carson glanced down at John who had once again succumbed to unconsciousness and replied softly, "I hope so Rodney, I hope so."

………………………………………………………………………………………………

The last several hours had gone by at a snail's pace for Elizabeth, and as she watched John sleep quietly with Rodney on the bed next to him and Teyla sitting quietly beside her with Ronon leaning up against the wall she was thankful that she knew John would make it.

Elizabeth felt her mind reliving the tumult it had experienced earlier that day. When there had been another power spike in the lab and John and Rodney were not answering any radio hails, she had felt her heart stop.

She had feared that even with Carson being on his way without the transporters it would be too long for John or anyone else in the lab to be reached by medical personnel. It had been absolutely agonizing waiting for news at that time, having no idea if John and Rodney were even still alive. Finally she had gotten the call that told her that John and Rodney had been in the room when it had exploded, but were both still alive. The relief however was short lived as John, she was told, was in serious condition and was being taken to surgery and Rodney was in the infirmary getting treated.

Elizabeth had quickly made her way to the infirmary to check on Rodney and John. She discovered that Rodney had broken his left arm, had a mild concussion, and was bruised all over. The doctor on duty had explained that if it was just those things, Rodney would have been able to be released to his quarters, but apparently Rodney's daily habits had already worn down his body, and Dr. Biro had decided that Rodney should stay in the infirmary overnight to be on the safe side and so that they could ensure that Rodney got the rest he needed.

Then Elizabeth was regulated to hours of waiting for news on John as Carson worked to repair her injured second in command. When Carson, after what seemed like a lifetime, had come out from the surgery to talk with them, Elizabeth had risen from her uncomfortable chair to face whatever Carson had to say head on. Yet, as she now looked back on it, she realized she hadn't even been close to prepared for what he had had to say.

Elizabeth glanced down at John now as she berated herself for the actions she took since the crash yesterday. How could she have been so stupid and self-centered? Why hadn't she realized John was hurt? How could she have missed it? She felt like slime as she understood that her own actions were part of the reason John was lying deathly still before her now.

Elizabeth's mind recounted John's injuries and Carson's theories behind the cause of each of them. The most serious had been his spleen. Apparently in the crash he had torn it slightly. Not enough that it was a life-threatening problem in itself. In fact, if it had been discovered right after the crash it probably could have been solved without invasive surgery, by simply making sure John rested and didn't make any sudden movements.

However, instead of making John get checked out by a doctor after a crash that only moments before she thought might have killed him, she had yelled at him making it even less likely that he would seek out a physician's help. So he didn't know to avoid sudden jerky movements, like being thrown back in an explosion, that could easily tear his spleen farther or cause it to rupture, which was exactly what happened.

In fact, Carson hypothesized that simply John's running to the lab had been enough to tear it farther, though his being thrown against the wall by the explosion is what completely did it in. Elizabeth kept thinking about the fact that if John had been checked over right after the crash, he would have been confined to the infirmary were medical professionals would have ensured that that didn't happen.

Instead it did happen, which caused a shocking amount of internal bleeding and blood loss that Carson had needed to use surgery to rectify.

Then along with that injury, there were bruises all over his torso from having impacted with the jumper's consol and then the wall after the explosion; impacts that Carson was surprised hadn't cracked or broken any ribs of John's ribs. John had also sprained his wrist quite severely, though Carson was hopeful it would heal without the need of surgery. Carson was unsure if that particular injury had been caused by the crash, explosion, or a mixture of the two and Elizabeth found herself desperately wishing she knew.

She wished when she had asked John after the jumper crash if he was alright, she had waited until she had gotten an actual answer instead of his standard response. Then, maybe she would have been able to tell Carson which injuries were new and which were old. In fact, Elizabeth should have known better and simply gotten John to get checked out no matter how many times he told the world he was fine right after the crash.

Elizabeth looked away from John for a moment as she felt her eyes burn with tears she refused to shed as her guilt almost overwhelmed her at how close they came to losing John, and how she would be partially responsible if they had.

Even though he must have been in a lot of pain from the injuries he sustained in the crash, she had jumped down his throat. She hadn't forced him to go to the infirmary to get checked out, where the tear in John's spleen would have been discovered and taken care of without risking his life and forcing him to have major surgery. Elizabeth felt bile rise in her throat at how wretched that made her feel.

Elizabeth's stomach twisted with shame and she desperately wished she could turn back time and change the decisions she had made. All she could do now was try to make up for the mistakes she had made. Listening to John's steady breathing, she was grateful she would have the chance.

……………………………………………………………………………………………..

The first thing John became aware of upon waking was how dry his mouth and throat felt. The second was of Carson standing beside him with a cup full of tantalizing ice chips.

Gratefully John savored the refreshing cool of the ice as it helped to soothe his sore throat. A few minutes later, as he swallowed the last of it, he tried to think back to what had landed him once again in Carson's lair. Too confused by the random images that assaulted him to come up with a coherent answer, John croaked out "wha…what happened?"

"I don' even know where ta begin ta answer that question, but I suppose the event that finally brought ye here was an explosion in a lab."

John nodded slowly as he allowed his mind to sort through the images to see that was indeed the case. "How's Rodney?" he asked as his mind supplied the fact he had been with him.

"See for yerself." At Carson's words John looked to his side and saw Rodney curled up on the bed beside him. Carson continued, "He's doing pretty well. He broke his left arm, was bumped around some and was exhausted, but he's back to his usual sunny disposition.

"You mean complaining about everything?"

"Aye" Carson said with a smile that abruptly turned serious as he continued, "but his complaining is nothing ta what ye do ta me."

"Huh?"

"John, for a bit in there I thought we'd—we'd lost ye. If we had had to wait much longer to give you a blood transfusion, we would have."

John simply nodded as he was at a loss to what to say to the obvious emotion in Carson's voice and face. John never knew what to say or do in these situations and avoided them as a rule, but thankfully further response ended up not being necessary; the exhaustion that had been present since he woke up began to win the battle and pull him back under.

Noticing this Carson gently patted his arm and said, "Sleep lad, yer body certainly needs it," and John did.

…………………………………………………………………………………………........

Rodney was lying on a bed by John's trying to type on his laptop with one hand. He had already been released to his room with orders to rest, but he had refused. After all, he had no intention of being sent to his room like a disobedient child, regardless of the fact Carson was claiming he was acting like one. Besides Carson may have missed something and he could take a turn for the worst at any moment, which meant it would be best for him to already be surrounded by medical personnel and equipment.

Not to mention the fact, he absolutely would not leave until he got to see for himself that John was going to be okay. Though Carson had assured him John was going to be fine, Rodney did not plan on relying on the opinion of a voodoo priest. Instead, he was going to wait until he could speak with John himself, which was proving difficult as John was sleeping pretty much constantly. After his brief bout with lucidity the day before, which he had slept through, John seemed to always be out of it, especially when Rodney was around and awake.

So, Carson had finally given in as long as Rodney promised to stay on the bed and rest. Considering the fact the bed was right next to John's, Rodney had readily agreed.

Abruptly, Rodney was shaken from his thoughts of how to extend the long range sensors and his attempts at typing one-handed on his laptop, by a voice clearing beside him.

"Yes, Carson?" he asked in a snide voice.

"When I agreed ta let ye stay here it was under the condition of ye resting."

"I am resting! I didn't get out of bed did I? Besides it's not like I was seriously injured like Colonel Calamity over there. There really is no reason for you to be ordering me around at all!"

"Aye, except for the fact ye exhausted yer body before the explosion even occurred. I have heard from many people that the night before it ye didn' sleep at all, and I know ye hadn' been getting a lot of sleep the days prior ta that. Yer body not only needs rest ta help ye heal from breaking yer arm and getting bruised, but also ta help ye recover from the abuse of unhealthy habits, like feasting on junk food, drinking caffeine, and not getting enough sleep, ye heap upon it!"

"I don't have unhealthy habits! I just need less sleep than everyone else, and I don't eat too much junk food or drink too much caffeine!"

A soft snort to Rodney's left immediately brought Rodney and Carson's attention to John's slightly smiling face. Opening his eyes, John looked at Rodney and mumbled, "Sure Rodney, _everyone_ has at least 15 _large_ cups of coffee a day."

"Hey! You're awake!" Rodney replied, ignoring John's comment.

"Yeah, there was this annoying scientist next too my bed, so I gave up on trying to get any shut-eye" was the weak response.

"That was uncalled for! After all, I did save your life."

"Really," grunted John as Carson flashed the penlight of hell into his eyes and then went on to check over his wound. "I don't remember that. Though I don't have a very clear picture of what happened and how I got hurt."

"Well," Carson said, in a deceivingly nonchalant manner, which immediately put Rodney on alert, but John was so out of it that he missed the danger of it, "I need ta ask ye a question. Did ye get hurt at all in the jumper crash?"

John thought for a moment, "Well, I was bruised up a little, and my wrist hurt a bit, but I figured it wasn't too bad."

"Anything else? Did anything start hurting later, which you thought was peculiar?"

"My side started to hurt more," John was silent for a moment trying to remember if there had been any other problems and then said, "I noticed my left shoulder starting hurting."

"And ye didn' think that ye should stop by the infirmary ta get checked out?"

Rodney could see that John was just now realizing the dangerous ground he was on as he carefully answered.

"I was planning on it, but I thought waiting just a bit wouldn't be a problem…"

"Right. Now, can ye tell me what university ye got yer medical degree at that would give ye the idea ye shouldn't stop by the infirmary if ye were in a, I don't know—CRASH!"

"Ummm…is their any response here that won't get me in more trouble?"

Rodney gave John a look of pity as Carson said, "No, no there isn'. John, you tore yer spleen in the crash and were bleeding internally. Both yer shoulder hurting and yer side increasing in pain were signs of that. Ye should have been in the infirmary so trained medical professionals could keep an eye on ye ta ensure that ye didn' tear it farther, which ye did by the way in yer running ta the lab and then being thrown against a wall."

"I'm sorry Carson. I really didn't think it was serious, and with everything that happened between Dr. Weir and me, I really wasn't in the mood to make an even bigger deal about the crash by showing up in the infirmary."

"Well I'd bloody say that what ye did manage made the deal that ye would have made microscopic! John…just do us all a favor and when ye get hurt, let professionals determine how bad it is."

"I will Carson."

"Good, now would ye like ta hear how Rodney 'saved' yer life and more of the details of how ye ended up once again as my guest?"

"Yeah, I would like to hear it."

"Well, I'll just administer yer medicine and let Rodney fill ye in on all that happened."

John looked expectantly at Rodney as Rodney began to explain how he had, heroically, pulled John out of the laboratory about to explode even though he had a broken arm.

"What caused the explosions anyways?" John asked when Rodney had finished his rather loquacious explanation.

"Zelenka is trying to go over the data and figure that out, but he isn't having much luck and Carson has absolutely refused to let me work on it. He even threatened Zelenka and all the other scientists with physicals if they give me _anything_ on it, which is _so_ unfair, but I figure I can hack into Zelenka's file tonight and work on it. However, what we do know is that you're activating the device is what started the power build up that resulted in the explosion when we were in the lab. Hey, are you okay?"

"Don't…know" wheezed John, "It just…started…getting…hard…to breathe…"

Rodney took in John's flushed face, shallow panting breaths, and the rapid beating of the heart monitor and called out in a slightly panicked voice, "Carson! Something's wrong with John!"

Carson who had left during Rodney's long winded explanation rushed over to them, took in John's conditions and muttered "bloody hell!"

………………………………………………………………………………………………

To be continued

A/N: Okay, so I need to apologize for another cliff hanger ending, but with how crazy my life has been lately, it was either crazy cliff hanger ending or no new chapter so… Anyhow, please review and let me know what you think!


	5. Chapter 5

A/N: Sorry for the long delay in posting! Life has been pretty crazy lately, but here is a nice long chapter for you in thanks for all your wonderful reviews that keep me going! Oh, and for those of you who celebrate Thanksgiving, Happy Early Thanksgiving!

"John, I'm relieving you of command."

"What?" slurred John as he tried to focus on the stern visage of his commanding officer, despite the fact he felt like he was staked out under the sun in the middle of a desert.

"John you have a history of insubordination and though I chose to overlook that fact when I first brought you to Atlantis, I have come to regret that decision in light of recent events. First, you recklessly and with no regard for my orders crashed an irreplaceable jumper into the city. Not only that, but you showed yourself to be irresponsible, insubordinate, and unfit for command. Due to your actions, if I am to keep my authority on Atlantis I have to show that actions like those will not be tolerated even by the _former_ military head of Atlantis."

"Elizabeth, it wasn't my fault! Something went wrong with the jumper. I wasn't going against you!" John grimaced as he pushed his pain filled body that radiated heat into a sitting position and faced the angry and clearly unbelieving face of his superior.

Withholding a cry of pain as his left side screamed at him, he continued slightly out of breath, "Elizabeth, come on, think about all we've been through together on Atlantis; you have to trust me!"

"But, John, those aren't the only reasons I'm removing you from command. You caused a lab on Atlantis to explode killing Rodney!"

"I just wal…wait what? What are you talking about! Rodney's not dead! He's fine, I mean pretty fine; a little banged up, but definitely alive!" John shouted as his pulse quickened. "He just visited me in the infirmary! There's no way he's dead!"

"Do you remember him leaving the infirmary?" Elizabeth asked in a gentle and calming voice.

"I…no…we were talking…and…I don't know what happened next."

"Oh, John, you're mind must be trying to protect you, though I'm afraid it's just another sign you're unfit for duty," Elizabeth said with a soft sigh. "You were talking with Rodney and then Rodney started having difficulties breathing. Carson rushed over to see what the matter was, but by the time they figured out what was wrong it was too late."

"Wha…what do you mean? He was fine."

"He looked fine, yes, but he had torn his spleen in the explosion _you_ caused in the lab _you_ told him to go to and now thanks to _you_ he's dead.

"I didn't cause that explosion! I just walked into the room and activated the consol like Rodney said to!"

At his words, Elizabeth's expression turned angry, "Oh, so now you're blaming Rodney for his death when you're responsible for it!"

John's mind sought to comprehend the indictment being hurled at him and gasped out, "Wait what? That's not what I meant, I…"

"Why did you do it John? Was the stress of command too much for you? I can't tell you how many times I was told you couldn't handle it. I wish I had listened to them, maybe then Rodney would still be alive!"

"No, it just…"

"So, you couldn't just take out yourself! No, if you're going to commit suicide you have to go out in a big way. You wanted to take out Rodney as well as yourself in—what—a blaze of glory? Well, I can assure you that there is no glory in the explosion you caused; not for you anyways." Elizabeth's voice softened for a moment. "He saved your life you know." Then she clenched her teeth and added, "Of course, he had no clue that you were trying to get both of you killed."

John desperately tried to answer her but found the relentless pounding in his head was keeping him from forming a coherent thought and he was forced to simply endure the continuing barrage from Elizabeth.

"Why is it that you survived instead of him? He deserved to live; you're the one who should have died; deserved to die. No, instead he's dead all because you couldn't handle the stress of being in command on Atlantis; well let me assure you that will no longer be an issue."

John's mouth was dry and he felt his heart racing. Was he responsible for Rodney's death? He couldn't be sure he wasn't. Whether or not he had set it up to explode it was clear that it had responded to his gene. Rodney had even told him that.

John's eyes were drawn back to the cold flint of Elizabeth's eyes as she said, "you're a murder John! It's not even like Rodney's the first one you killed. You're responsible for so many deaths!" John's muddled and confused mind found no difficulty in accepting the truth in that statement as names and faces flashed through his mind beginning with Colonel Sumner. The guilt crashed over him and seemed to submerge him like an ocean wave in its relentless fury.

"Take him to the brig," Elizabeth's words broke through the haze John found himself in and he saw that two buff marines were standing behind her. She turned to walk away completely emotionless as if it didn't matter to her in the slightest that she had just sentenced John to the same brig they had kept life-sucking wraith.

"Wait!" John called out, "I don't know why the explosion occurred, but I wasn't trying to commit suicide or kill Rodney! Please, just think about this!"

Elizabeth, however, didn't give the slightest sign she heard the desperate pleading from John and exited the infirmary as the two muscular marines made their way to John. John felt himself panicking and struggled to draw in oxygen as two of his own men grabbed his arms to drag him off to the cell in which he had once killed a wraith.

At that idea, John's instincts took over and he found himself fighting with all the strength, little though it was, he could muster. Yet, their grips were firm and John found that he couldn't break away.

"Let me go! I didn't do it! Whatever happened was an accident! Let go!" The grips did not loosen at his cries, but John became aware of voices saying his name over and over again. For a moment, he wondered in confusion why the marine's lips weren't moving as they said his name, but then the world seemed to dissolve around him and instead of the marines there was Carson and Ronon.

"Carson, I didn't do it! You have to tell Elizabeth! I don't want to be put in the cell Steve was in!"

"No one is going ta put ye in a cell. Just breathe. Come on John everything's fine, ye just need ta calm down. I'm sure ye didn' do whatever, and I'll make sure Elizabeth knows that as well. Just take a deep breath. That's it. Now, another. Good!" Ronon and Carson gently pushed John back unto the sweat soaked sheets as he continued to utter soothing phrases.

Exhausted and in pain, John let himself relax against the pillows and took several shuddering breaths before gasping out, "wha…what happened?"

"Ye were having a nightmare and we were having a hard time waking ye up.

John nodded while his mind sorted his memories to determine what had been real and what hadn't been. Abruptly he tried to push himself up saying, "Rodney! Is Rodney really dead! I didn't mean to kill him! It was just that he told me to activate it and I did, I didn't know that it would explode, I…" John talked faster and faster and found himself growing lightheaded.

"Breathe! John ye need ta breathe, come on! Rodney's fine! He's not dead and ye certainly didn' kill him. He's restin' in his room right now, perfectly fine, not that ye'd know that ta here him speak. Come on John! Ye need ta calm down!"

Yet, John was beyond rational thought and Carson's words were swept away without making a dent in the panic that was overtaking John. He began thrashing around as he took in the fact Ronon and Teyla were both there in the infirmary with him, but Rodney wasn't. Rodney always was there!

John realized they must be trying to hide Rodney's death from him, because they didn't think he could handle it in his present condition. Elizabeth had said he was dead and she never lied to him, so if she said he had killed Rodney, he must have, John reasoned as he forgot that it had all been a nightmare.

Suddenly, John's eyes fixed on a figure standing just behind Carson.

"Rodney!" he shouted!

"Why did you want me dead John? Why?" asked the pale figure whose arm was hanging at an awkward angle.

"Rodney, I didn't I swear! You told me to activate it and that's all I did!"

"So, now you're blaming me for my own death!"

"No, Rodney, I just—"

"It's all your fault I'm dead! I trusted you, yet look at what you did! Elizabeth's right! You should be locked in the brig!" After saying that, Rodney's pale form disappeared before John's eyes and he began to struggle to get away from arms pinning him down with a renewed vigor.

All John knew was he had to get away from everyone and the too loud voices that called out things like "hallucinating," "tore his stitches" and "sedatives". It all seemed too much for his battered mind and John desperately wanted to escape it all before his head finally exploded.

Abruptly he felt a sharp pain on his arm and something cool enter his veins. Almost immediately he felt the fight flow out of him and he dropped exhaustedly back on the bed. Though many thoughts still raced through his mind, John found his eyes closing, and he drifted off to the world of nightmares.

………………………………………………………………………………………………………

Carson looked down at all the files, reports, readouts, and data sheets, and felt like throwing something. "It just doesn't make sense. There is no reason for John's body to be acting the way it is," muttered Carson.

John had been recovering with zero complications after the surgery. Everything had been fine, then all of a sudden John' struggling to breathe. Carson recalled his confusion and horror as suddenly John took a turn for the worst and Carson didn't have a proper clue as to why.

It felt like every time Carson checked on him, John was showing more symptoms and no matter what medication Carson gave John to relieve the symptoms it seemed that more just popped up.

Now, John had a high fever and was hallucinating and no matter what Carson or the others said to calm him, John would thrash around. Carson had even been forced to put John's arms in restraints to prevent him from hurting himself further. John had already torn his stitches once and with John's current fragile health, Carson was not about to risk any more injuries; the ones he was dealing with already were quite enough.

It was so frustrating for Carson that no matter what test he did, he wasn't finding what was wrong with John. There was no sign of infection and the symptoms didn't completely support that anyway.

Carson kept thinking of how Rodney, Elizabeth, Ronon, and Teyla had looked when he told them he had no idea what caused John's relapse, but whatever it was; it was killing him. It was almost like the medicines themselves were poisoning John, which was absurd as John had been doing fine on them only hours previously.

Sighing, Carson pushed himself up and walked over to where John was tossing and turning as nightmares robbed him of restful sleep. Gently Carson wiped John's sweaty heated brow with a cool cloth.

"Come on lad, just hold on."

…………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………

Rodney took another delicious swallow of the one cup of coffee the evil voodoo sorcerer, otherwise known as Carson, allowed and studied the readouts on the screen in front of him. Zelenka had finally given in, and gave him all the data on the power spike, subsequent explosion, and malfunctioning transporters. Not that he had had much of a choice.

After witnessing John's sudden and unexplainable relapse, Rodney had been unable to 'rest' or sit still for that matter. His mind was going a million miles a minute, and like always, he had to find something to do. So, he had forced Zelenka to cough up the research, though Rodney knew deep down, that it was more from the desperation and worry in his eyes that got Zelenka to hand it over than the glare on his face or the triad he had uttered.

Rodney set his coffee cup down and clicked on another file, bewailing the fact he could only use one of his arms, which made even the simplest of tasks more difficult. Thinking of his arm brought Rodney's focus to the rest of his body that either ached or throbbed, though of course his arm was doing the best at keeping his attention. The painkillers Carson had given him had worn off, but Rodney was reluctant to get more, as he was afraid that Carson would make him stop working, which was the only thing keeping him sane at the moment. Every time he was still for more than a minute, his mind would flash back to John struggling to breathe as alarms went off all around him.

Rodney, clicked on another file, and forced his mind away from the infirmary were Carson was fighting to figure out why John went from getting better to crashing. While Rodney scanned the data, he reluctantly admitted to himself that Zelenka had done a pretty good job on figuring things out so far. It's just that Zelenka had hit a wall, the same wall Rodney had now encountered and had been banging his head against for the past few hours.

There was something about the explosion that simply was not making sense. The more he looked at the data Atlantis had on the lab, the more he realized there was no reason for it to have exploded, yet it had. Still, what he found even more puzzling was why John's touching the consol had overloaded the system and caused it to explode.

There was no logical reason for events to have played out the way they did, and Rodney hated things that went against logic. Rodney rubbed his tired eyes with his good hand, while wondering if maybe he should give in, and simply work on it later. After all, Carson had forbidden him from doing any work, and he had been at it for the past few hours. Maybe…just maybe…he should take a break…

No, Rodney firmly shook his head as images of John gasping for breath popped in his head. He clicked on another file and scanned it looking for any anomalies that would explain what had happened.

He was about to click on the next one, when he saw it. It was small, easily missed, but Rodney's brilliant mind latched onto it. Typing as quickly as he could with his one hand, he double checked, cross checked, and tore the data apart.

It remained.

"Elizabeth!" Rodney said in a strained voice he barely controlled, "I need to see all senior staff immediately! I think someone is trying to kill Sheppard!"

………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………….

Ronon looked around the room seeing all the senior staff gathered; all except Sheppard that is. It was weird for Ronon not to see him slouching in his chair, for all the world appearing lazy and unaware of his surroundings. Yet, most on Atlantis had learned that John was anything but lazy and unaware of his surroundings. It was an act John liked to put on to catch people off guard. Who would suspect the person leaning against the wall with his hands in his pocket and the 'fly-boy' grin on his face, as Rodney called it, could snap a man's neck with his bare hands.

Rodney entered the room in a rush and Ronon missed Sheppard's snarky comments at Rodney being the last one to arrive at the meeting as he had been the one to call it in the first place.

It was clear to Ronon that Rodney had completely ignored Carson's orders to rest, and he felt a flash of worry for the irritating scientist that had somehow become part of the group of people he cared about. There were dark circles under his eyes and his movements were jittery as if hyped up on caffeine with no actual energy to back it. Teyla, who also noticed this, quickly pulled Rodney to a chair and urged him to sit as everyone else turned to listen to the clearly agitated scientist.

"Someone's trying to kill Sheppard," Rodney began with out preamble. "I've checked the data over again and again and it holds, the power spike was a means to lure Sheppard down to the lab, the consol was set to overload when Sheppard's gene activated it, a virus was activated, so none of the transporters would work after Sheppard had used it to get to the lab, so Sheppard would be the only one in the lab when it exploded, and everyone would be too far out to get him help in time."

Elizabeth interrupted him, "But Rodney, you said that you were the one who told John to activate the consol, so he wouldn't have activated it if you weren't there, right?"

"Actually, the reason I told him to activate the device is due to the main consol making it look like there was a failsafe on it that needed to be activated, and if John had been alone in the room, I would have told him over the radio to check the main consol, and he would have discovered the 'failsafe' and activated the consol anyway; besides, as I said, it was set up to only activate with Sheppard's gene.

"Yet, if I wasn't there I wouldn't have been able to help slow down the build up from the consol and there would have been no chance that Sheppard could have gotten far enough away to survive the explosion. It was only the luck that I was in a nearby section and didn't need to use the transporter to get to him, so I was able to be there and do some brilliant work, delaying the explosion until both of us were far enough from the blast to not be burnt to a crisp."

Rodney was silent for a moment as everyone contemplated how different the explosion could have played out. Ronon, on his part, couldn't stop himself from imagining arriving at lab and discovering his friend blackened, burnt, and dead. It was a far from pleasant thought and Ronon firmly pushed it away for fodder of later nightmares as Rodney began to speak again.

"I'm having Zelenka look over the data from the crash again as I would guess that it was the first attempt on Sheppard's life, which would mean…"

"It's possible John's sudden relapse was the third," interrupted Carson who had a grim and determined look on his face.

"You mean he might have been poisoned or something?" Ronon asked with an angry expression as he imagined beating to a bloody pulp whoever was trying to kill Sheppard.

"Aye," Carson said as he took a deep breath and then said, "I need ta go and test Sheppard's blood for anything that looks like poison."

"Understood Carson. Go."

"Elizabeth, I'd like to go with Carson and stay with John right now," Teyla said as Carson quickly left the room. Elizabeth nodded her agreement and Teyla followed him out of the room while Elizabeth turned to Lorne. "We need to have a marine guarding Sheppard at all times to make sure no one can finish what they've begun."

"Will do and I'll only put people I absolutely trust on it."

"Good, but you need to have the marine watch Sheppard in such a way that whoever is trying to kill John isn't alerted to the fact we're onto him."

Lorne nodded in understanding clearly trying to think of the best way to do that.

"You know," Rodney said with a slightly sickened look, "It probably wasn't a marine who did it. All of the attempts, point to someone who knows what they're doing around a computer. I mean, I almost missed figuring out the lab explosion. Whoever, is trying to kill Sheppard knows how to cover their tracks, it is only because I'm a genius that I found the information that led me to realizing it was a trap to kill John."

"Which means we're dealing with a scientist," Elizabeth said slowly.

"Yeah, most likely, at least I would say a scientist is involved somehow," Rodney said clearly upset at the idea that whoever was trying to kill John was someone he had picked to join the expedition.

"Rodney," Ronon said firmly, "what is happening to John is in no way your fault."

"Oh sure! A scientist I probably picked is trying to kill off one of my best friends and it's not my fault!"

"Rodney, calm down," Elizabeth said firmly, "You are not at fault at all. It's just your exhaustion talking. In fact, Ronon, could you take Rodney to his quarters and ensure that he sleeps."

"Elizabeth! I have so much I need to do right now! There is no way that I can rest right now!"

"Not a problem," Ronon said with a nod to Elizabeth as he began to manhandle Rodney out of the room. "I'll make sure he gets sleep if I have to sit on him."

"What!?"

"Zelenka will keep working, Rodney just go lie down," Elizabeth said with a slight smile at the outraged scientist presently being pushed out of the room towards well needed sleep by Ronon. Ronon, however, noticed that the smile quickly disappeared as thoughts of John passed through her mind as he left the room.

………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………….

Lorne sighed after they were gone. "Dr. Weir, the only way I can think of to have a marine always watching Colonel Sheppard without alerting whoever is after him that we're on to him is by having everyone think that we suspect John of something. That way we can have a guard on him always, and people will assume it's to protect everyone against Colonel Sheppard instead of that we are trying to protect him."

Lorne's glance at Dr. Weir confirmed the fact she hated the idea as well. Seriously, the idea of making most of the people on Atlantis think that he suspected that Sheppard was a security threat made him sick to his stomach. He was honored to serve under a CO like Colonel Sheppard and it felt like being disloyal to him if everyone on Atlantis began to think that something was wrong with Colonel Sheppard because of his actions; even if the reason he was doing it was to protect him.

"You're right, Major. I can't think of any other way either. Just make sure that the marines watching him know that it's his protection not his escape that they are to be concerned about."

"I most definitely will ma'am."

"Alright, please alert the others of what we have to do. If anyone asks, try to be as diplomatic as possible on the reasons why we are having John guarded. Explain that it is purely precautionary, until a full investigation has been done."

"I will ma-am,"

At Dr. Weir's nod, Lorne left the room and immediately began to radio the marines he wished to have guarding his CO's life. He knew they would be willing and honored to help protect the life of Colonel Sheppard. He just hoped that they'd succeed.

Not long later, several marines were standing in front of Lorne. They were in Sheppard's office as it was bigger than his own, and with such sensitive information he didn't want to use their general briefing rooms.

"…so to make sure that whoever is after Colonel Sheppard fails, I need to have you take turns guarding him, but here's the thing you have to act like your watching him because he's under suspicion."

"Sir, you mean we have to proceed like we believe Colonel Sheppard was at fault in the jumper crash and that he was responsible for the explosion?"

Lorne scanned the faces of the other men and saw the same distaste at the idea on their faces as on the marine who had just spoken. All these men respected Colonel Sheppard, and like Lorne, hated that they needed to act like the Colonel was a security risk.

In fact, pretty much all the soldiers on Atlantis, who had been there for longer than a month, would hate the idea. They respected Sheppard and many of them stopped just short of being in awe of him. However, Lorne thought wryly, Sheppard rarely realized how much he meant to his men, and how hard it was for all of them when he was hurt or in the infirmary.

"I dislike this as much as you do, but we need to do it to keep him safe, and make sure whoever is trying to kill him won't simply disappear and go after Sheppard when we aren't prepared."

The men nodded and Lorne felt a bit better now that he had someone watching Sheppard at all times. He just hoped that Dr. Beckett could figure out what was behind the last attempt; before the last attempt no longer was an 'attempt' and a future one was a mute issue.

…………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………

To Be Continued

A/N: So now you know a bit about why the jumper crashed and such… I hope you liked the chapter and if you did…PLEASE review! ;) You can also review if you didn't of course….


	6. Chapter 6

A/N: OH MY GOSH! I am SO sorry it has taken me so long to update! I have been super busy lately with school, finals, work, transferring to UCR, family, church, children's ministry, eating, breathing—you get the idea. However, I never forgot about you guys and I valiantly waged the war against it all and finally managed to finish refining this rather difficult chapter to write. I hope you all enjoy it and Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays!!!

Rodney awoke slowly. He felt better than he had in what felt like forever, though his body protested when he shifted slightly. Apparently better was still a relative term.

He glanced at the clock by his bedside and realized he had been asleep for almost 12 hours straight. Jolting out of bed in shock at that information, Rodney began to mutter to himself as he worked on getting ready for the day, "I can't believe how long I slept! Why didn't my alarm wake me? Did I forget to set it last night? I had wanted to get an early start today and now I'm hours behind and there is still someone out there trying to kill Sheppard, unless they succeeded while I was sleeping—no, Sheppard can't be dead. Someone would have woken me up to tell me if he was, right? Of course, right! Besides, there is no way John could die; he's too stubborn. Though, since they would have radioed me to tell me he's worse it also probably means they would have radioed me if he was better. So, Carson must not have found anything yet, so he isn't better either."

Rodney sighed disheartened at the idea of John not being better, though the relief at the idea that John wasn't worse was also there.

Pulling a shirt over his head after his shower, Rodney thought of what things he should do first when he got to his lab to help him gain more information on who was trying to kill Sheppard, so he could eliminate that threat. He was after all a genius and had saved the day countless times before, so there was no reason why he couldn't figure everything out this time too, right?

Thinking about all the work he needed to do, though, Rodney was once again surprised by how much he had slept last night. He never slept that long when he was required to work his magic to help bring order back to his kingdom, especially when he had a lot on his mind such as someone trying to kill one of his best friends.

Rodney couldn't even pinpoint the time were the people he worked with on Atlantis went from being colleagues to friends, or in some cases—family. Nonetheless, Rodney was certainly glad that it had happened, though he tried to hide from everyone how much his friends meant to him, not that it was easy to keep it hidden when you kept being afraid that they were going to die!

The door chimed and Rodney called out for whomever to come in.

"Morning" Ronon said, entering with a large tray filled with food. "Figured you'd be ready for breakfast about now."

"What are you doing here?" Rodney asked even as he grabbed a piece of bacon off the tray and stuffed it in his mouth.

"Carson asked me to bring you some breakfast and make sure you ate it."

"Huh? Why would he do that?"

"He thought you might just grab a power bar and head straight to your lab and he said he wanted to make sure you had a real breakfast."

Rodney could not deny that since that had been exactly what he had been planning on doing and simply munched on a piece of toast instead while Ronon snatched up a yellowish-pink fruit that looked almost like a pear.

"So how did you end up being my waiter?"

"Carson asked me too?"

"Well, yeah. I mean why you and not someone else?"

"Convenience. Carson asked me to bring it to you last night while I was getting the sleeping pill I gave you."

"Oh," Rodney nodded about to take another bite of bacon when he registered what Ronon had just said. "Wait! What?!" he exclaimed his outrage pouring through his gaze with a look that would have instantly killed most people, though of course it simply bounced off Ronon. "You gave me a sleeping pill! Why would you do that?!"

"Yesterday after the meeting I got you back to your room like Dr. Weir asked. You kept trying to do work in here even though you were told to rest. I figured the easiest way to make sure you got sleep was to ask Carson to give you a sleeping pill and he had no problem in giving it to me after I explained the situation."

"You drugged me!"

"You needed it and Carson agreed it was for the best."

"I can't believe you guys! What if there had been an emergency?! Who else can fix all the problems on Atlantis like I can? Zelenka certainly can't! You're lucky Atlantis wasn't blown up during the night!"

At that, Rodney became silent as it brought too mind the all too recent explosion he had been a part of. In a hesitant voice he asked, "How's Sheppard? Has Carson discovered what he was poisoned with?"

"No."

"Oh."

"Carson's been working on it all night though. He stopped a bunch of the medication as he's afraid they have been interacting with the poison making John worse. It's helped some Carson said. John's not getting worse and he's more lucid when he is awake. But, it also means he's in a lot more pain as Carson isn't willing to risk the more potent painkillers anymore."

Rodney, having swallowed his own painkillers right after waking up, didn't even want to begin to imagine how much pain John must be in right now. Pushing the thought away he tried to focus on the positive.

"Well shouldn't the poison just leave his system now and once it's gone Carson can give him the good stuff again?"

"That's the thing, whatever is in John's system isn't leaving and Carson's not sure how to treat it yet."

"But you said that John's not deteriorating, so besides him being in some pain it's not like he's going to die, right? Carson will have plenty of time to figure it out."

Ronon shook his head clearly bothered by what he was about to say. "Carson said the poison has already done so much damage to John's system that unless he can begin to repair the damage John will still die. All he's managed to do so far is stabilize John for the time being. He said he's not sure how long that will last though."

Rodney felt his stomach clench as his fear almost overwhelmed at the idea of losing John. Life on Atlantis would be awful without John, the one who never got defensive when Rodney was arrogant, was always ready to trade good-natured ribbing, was way smarter than he pretended to be, and was even willing to give up his life if it would save Rodney's.

"What about Zelenka? Has he figured anything else out? No, don't answer that. Of course, he hasn't. He isn't me after all. I still can't believe you drugged me. Seriously, why would you do that? I told that sheep-herder I was fine, yet instead I'm sent to bed like a five year old, and then if that wasn't enough you DRUG me!"

Ronon just grinned at him as Rodney continued his rant, obviously not bothered in the least by Rodney's ire and enjoying the food still on the tray. After a minute Rodney decided it would be in his best interest to focus more on eating before Ronon ate all the food as his beneficial and overwhelmingly valuable monologue was being wasted on the caveman who had no interest in the enlightenment Rodney was offering.

Rodney took a swallow of the marvelous coffee Ronon had brought him and decided wondered if he should head down to the infirmary and check on Sheppard or if he should head straight to his lab to work on finding out who was trying to kill him.

Taking in consideration how sore he still felt he decided that it might be better to stay away from Carson and not risk getting told he wasn't allowed to work yet. After all, the evil sadist, otherwise known as Carson, was well known for keeping people from their important and life changing work when it suited his evil designs.

Rodney took another bite from the non-citrus fruit he was eating and glanced over at Ronon whose feet were propped up upon his desk. Rodney could see how tense Ronon was holding his shoulders and knew that Ronon was hating having nothing to do to help John. It was how the team was. Whenever a teammate was in danger not being able to do anything to help was the worst thing possible.

Sadly, it happened all too often that a member of the team was in life threatening peril; and it was those times that Rodney realized the most how important his team was to him. For instance, it wasn't until Ronon had been captured by a wraith to be used as a runner again that he appreciated how Ronon had come to be part of his surrogate family: the 'that's-my-annoying-brother-who-could-beat-me-up-with-his-eyes-closed-and-both-hands-tied-behind-his-back' brother, but surrogate brother nonetheless.

Rodney could think of several times on missions were Ronon had ensured that Rodney was safe from attack, and Rodney had once gone off on a scientist moronic enough to imply Ronon was stupid. Not that he didn't say it all the time himself, but he wasn't about to allow another person say anything against his teammate. Friends at all were still too much of a novelty for Rodney not to.

It had shocked Rodney when he had first realized not only how much he had come to care for Ronon, John, and Teyla, but how they had come to like him as well. Rodney knew he was not the easiest—okay so he was downright impossible to get along with, yet despite his lack of people skills, his team had come too actually like him. They had learned to read between the lines of his arrogant and insensitive comments and see his insecurities, which had to be both the most terrifying and most exhilarating thing Rodney could imagine; even more wonderful then winning the Nobel Prize. Not that he would let anyone know that.

Finishing the last of his coffee, Rodney set it on the tray and stood up while picking up the tray with one hand and balancing it on his cast. However, Rodney belatedly realized he was not as well as he had thought as in standing he overbalanced and almost fell; his equilibrium clearly not up to his normal standards. However, right before he and the tray went crashing to the floor Ronon grabbed his arm to steady him.

"Thanks" Rodney said as Ronon then took the tray with one hand, clearly preferring to carry it rather than watch Rodney dump it all over the floor, and steadied Rodney with his other hand until Rodney's balance was such that he was not about to fall. Rodney realized as Ronon helped him that despite the pain having friends caused, when they insisted on almost dying all the time, there were also some benefits to having friends; like having someone there to keep you from falling.

Rodney just hoped that they could keep John from falling as well.

………………………………………………………………………………………………

"So what do you think of the rumors Teuila?"

"Honestly, I'm not sure, Kristina. I never would have believed that Colonel Sheppard would do anything to hurt this city or the people in it, but I don't think Dr. Weir would have him under guard unless she had a valid reason, especially considering how much she's trusted him in the past."

"Yeah, it doesn't make sense to me either. Rudy, in botany, believes that Colonel Sheppard finally cracked. He says that all the stress of being in command must have been too much for him, and he finally just broke."

"Dr. Collins is of the same opinion. Though, he figures it's probably been more gradual and simply no one really noticed the signs."

"I suppose that's possible, but I really think if he is responsible for the explosion and crash, he has to be under the influence of some alien or technology."

"Like the stories from the 2nd year on Atlantis?"

"Yeah, you know how everyone claims that Dr. Weir and Colonel Sheppard were taken over by some alien consciousness and then tried to kill each other. Well, I think this has to be something like that. I really don't believe Colonel Sheppard could have cracked. I've talked with him a few times and he's always seemed perfectly sane to me."

"They always do, before they crack Kristina. Besides, are you sure the fact he is incredibly hot isn't influencing your opinion?"

Kristina laughed good-naturedly at this not denying the fact she thought Colonel Sheppard was a dreamboat. "That is true" she drawled, "but seriously, Teuila, after all the times he's risked his life for this city and everyone here, there is no way you are going to get me to believe he was knowingly responsible for the explosion. You might be able to get me to believe he was responsible for the jumper crash, but the explosion, never."

There was silence for a few moments and then Kristina asked, "so, what does your handsome marine think of all this? He's knows Colonel Sheppard better than either of us."

"Kevin hasn't really talked about it much with me. He's one of the marines taking shifts guarding him and I think he knows more and isn't allowed to say. However, I can tell he's bothered by all this. He deeply respects Colonel Sheppard and is proud to serve under him, so having to keep watch over him is difficult. I mean, one of the few times I've seen Kevin really upset, I mean really upset, was when a new marine was badmouthing Colonel Sheppard right after arriving on Atlantis. He was talking about how he had no interest serving under an air force pilot who only got to be in command because of luck. If Major Lorne wasn't in the room, I seriously believe that Kevin would have knocked him down. For the next few days, Kevin was constantly ranting against the man, and going on and on about how amazing Colonel Sheppard is and how perfect he is for the job, and how only an idiot would think otherwise."

"What happened to the marine?"

"Kevin got a bunch of the other guys who had been on Atlantis from the beginning to help him play some practical jokes on the marine, until he got the idea, as far as Colonel Sheppard was concerned, he should just shut up."

"What did they do?"

"Well, they didn't do anything too serious as they didn't want to get in trouble, but Kevin has a friend in the science department who helped him override the door controls to the marine's room. Once there they set up the toilet so instead of it flushing it sprayed him with the water to refill the tank, they put some green dye in his shampoo so his hair turned green for a few days, and duck taped all his drawers shut, so he couldn't get them open, but they looked normal."

Imagining the sight of a marine desperately trying to open dresser drawers that simply refused to open sent Kristina into laughter, but finally she managed to gasp out, "Did the marine report any of this?"

"He did, but he reported it to Major Lorne, who also knew the marine had problems with Colonel Sheppard. Let's just say, that though Major Lorne was not able to openly approve of the pranks, he wasn't exactly sympathetic to a marine who had put down Colonel Sheppard, so nothing was really done about it."

"Did the marine ever change his opinion of Colonel Sheppard?"

"He did actually. Kevin said he didn't know much about it, but apparently when on a mission with Colonel Sheppard, Sheppard saved the marine's life with some brilliant strategy and impressive fighting. Afterwards, the marine joined the ranks of those who refuse to hear a word against the man."

Teuila and Kristina were silent for a moment as they thought about the fact that that man was now under suspicion and under guard even though he was still in the infirmary.

Sighing, Teuila stood up. "I need to get going. I'm supposed to meet Kevin after he gets off duty today, and I want to take a shower first."

Kristina couldn't help but smile at this. "I have the distinct impression it's that you want to get fixed up to impress him when he gets off duty."

"What can I say, I'm in love?"

"Oh get out of here, you make me sick."

"I do try!" Teuila said with a laugh as she left the table; all thoughts of Colonel Sheppard forgotten as her thoughts were filled with what Kevin's dark eyes would think of her when he saw her in a few hours.

………………………………………………………………………………………………

John felt as if he was on fire and his brain felt fuzzy as he awoke from another nightmare. He became aware along with the dull pain in his side of all sorts of wires attached to various parts of him, and he grimaced. He slowly opened his eyes and was thankful that the lights were dim as even that was almost too much for his overly sensitive eyes.

Shifting uncomfortably, John became aware of the fact his wrists were in restraints. It was hard to think straight, and John felt his heartbeat quicken. Why was he restrained? He was in the infirmary on Atlantis, he reminded himself firmly, and there had to be a good reason for it. Yet, John felt his panic rising as his mind flashed through the times he had been restrained before. Most of the times, being nightmarish experiences he longed to forget.

Glancing around, John hoped to see Carson or one of his team, so they could explain everything, but instead his eyes locked on a marine standing near his bed clearly guarding him. His heartbeat almost quadrupled in speed and he had to struggle to get air as he began to hyperventilate.

He hadn't done anything had he? Not like when he had been on the retrovirus, right? He couldn't think of any reason why he would be a security risk, but the evidence that everyone else apparently thought he was, was right there in front of his face—and around his wrists. John found himself jerking his restraints, and sought to still his hands until he had more information, as it hurt, especially for his left wrist, which had a bandage around it indicating some sort of injury.

John's perplexed mind desperately tried to trace back to why this was happening. He remembered Elizabeth being upset with him over the jumper crash, but surely that wasn't enough to have him restrained, and wouldn't she have done it immediately if she was going to do it at all? No, it couldn't be that, or at least not only that—wait, hadn't Rodney said something about his activating the consol being what caused the explosion?

Did they think that he had done it on purpose and was trying to sabotage Atlantis? Why would they think that? Surely, Elizabeth no matter how angry she was with him wouldn't think he would do that, would she?

With startling clarity his mind recalled the nightmares he had had and John struggled to assure himself they had only been dreams. Rodney was alive, Elizabeth wasn't blaming him for his death, and he wasn't in the brig. Yet the restraints and the guard pushed away any stability those thoughts might have brought.

Suddenly, John wasn't as sure that those things were from his nightmares and once again he began to feel the lines between reality and dream blur.

Suddenly, John was startled out of his thoughts by Carson, who had apparently been calling out to him for awhile now, trying to get his attention. "Ca…Carson?" John gasped out. "Why…why am I restrained…and what's…what's with the marine?" He tried to speak calmly and rationally, but he knew the heart monitor was ensuring that anyone within hearing range knew how not calm he was.

"John, please calm down. Everything is going ta be fine. I had ye restrained, because I was afraid ye would hurt yerself. Please just relax now, kay."

"What…what about Sergeant Erikson over there? It sure looks like he's supposed to be guarding me? I didn't do anything did I?"

John watched Carson pass a glance to Teyla, who had shown up while he had been panicking and he now noticed had placed her hand gently upon his shoulder.

"Its okay, John," Teyla answered with a look that begged him to trust her, "You didn't do anything. It's just a safety precaution, alright?"

"I…I don't understand. It was just a nightmare that Rodney had died, right?" At Carson's nod he continued, "Is this about the explosion? I didn't mean for it to happen! Honestly, it was just an accident, just like the jumper. Both of them malfunctioned, but I didn't do anything to cause it. You have to believe me! I just activated it like Rodney said to. I had no clue it was going to explode!"

John was brought from his speech as he once again became aware of the fact that Carson was calling out to him, desperately trying to get him to calm down. "Come on John. I need ye ta breathe. Yer not doing yerself any favors by not breathin. Everythin is okay. We're going ta take care of ye. Everything is goin ta be fine."

John caught his breath as Carson and Teyla continued to reassure him, and he found that his body was too exhausted and hot to continue trying to figure out what was going on. He allowed his body's demands to win and draw him back into the blackness of his nightmares.

………………………………………………………………………………………………

Teyla continued to gently comb her fingers through John's damp hair even though John had been asleep for sometime now. Yet, considering how many times she had wondered if she had lost him for good in just the last few days time, the idea of leaving him was repulsive. Her mind kept replaying the fear, panic, and confusion in his eyes as he tried to figure out why he was restrained and guarded.

Teyla wished that she could have simply told him directly that the guard was there to protect him, but she understood the reasons why they needed to act more as if John was under suspicion. The deception was one of the things helping to keep John safe and alive. She was simply glad that everyone had agreed that even if John was under suspicion it would be perfectly believable for the team to stay with him and show their concern for him.

John moaned, and shifted restlessly. Even in sleep he had no rest right now and Teyla felt her heart clench at the sight.

Softly she began to sing, hoping that it would help soothe him and keep any nightmares at bay. After only a few moments of the Anthosian melody hanging in the air, she watched as he stilled and a few of the lines of pain and fear around his eyes eased. However, the relief was tainted by the heat radiating off of him.

Continuing to sing quietly, Teyla desperately hoped that Carson would discover the cause of John's current decline in health and be able to fix it. In fact, she wanted everything fixed. She wanted whoever was trying to kill John caught and brought to justice. She wanted John to be out of danger and all the rumors silenced.

All the suspicion and whispers against John reminded her of how she had felt the first year on Atlantis when she had been under suspicion due to her wraith DNA. She hated how everyone had looked at her differently, but she also remembered with perfect clarity how valiantly and steadfastly John had defended her.

Not being able to do the same for John felt disloyal.

The fact that it hadn't taken long for all of Atlantis to be a buzz with the knowledge that John was under suspicion didn't help. Like any news in a place with a small and mostly confined population it had spread like wile fire. Wherever Teyla went she would overhear speculations over it, though the voices usually quieted when they became aware of her, knowing that she and the rest of the team, were fully behind John in this.

Still, it was impossible not to contemplate the conversations she heard no matter how quiet they had become. The words continued to echo in her head almost like the voice of a wraith queen.

However, Teyla felt a growing pride in many of the people of Atlantis as their loyalty to John was clearly evident. Teyla knew that John sometimes doubted the respect and honor he had earned on Atlantis, and Teyla, and to see that devotion shine forth in the midst of opposition gave a bit of a silver lining in what was otherwise a dark cloud.

……………………………………………………………………………………………....

Carson frowned as he looked at John's newest stats. He needed to figure out what John had been poisoned with. Yet, the problem was, there were so many possible causes for John's symptoms, and some of them had opposite remedies. Not to mention the fact, they had continued giving John all sorts of other medications, which would have interacted with the poison causing even more problems and concealing others.

Yet, whatever it was, Carson was having a difficult time pinpointing it in John's blood with all the other drugs that he had been giving to him. If only he had a sample of what had been given to John, but he doubted that whoever was trying to kill John would oblige.

Suddenly Carson sat up straight. What if he could find the syringe that had been used to deliver the poison, so he could test that? The killer would have tried to dispose it of course, but often the best way to do that was to put it in plain view; like where the infirmary disposed of hundreds of syringes!

"Kelly," Carson called out with excitement at his newest idea. "I need yer help. I think I've thought of a way ta find out what John was poisoned with."

………………………………………………………………………………………………

To be continued

A/N: I hope you enjoyed the chapter! Once again, I'm sorry it took me so long to post it. I'm afraid reality has been winning the fights lately… However, I'm hopeful I will be able to update much sooner than I did this time—though of course no promises ;) Please REVIEW!!! :D


	7. Chapter 7

A/N: I AM SO SORRY!!!! If there is anyone out there who is still interested in this story, I am super sorry I didn't get this chapter to you sooner. My life has been absolutely crazy and this chapter was really hard to right, in fact, I'm still not pleased with it, but I figured if I didn't post it now even without it being perfect I might never get it posted…

Just so you know, I have every intention of finishing this story. Even though I've haven't updated in forever, I have been thinking about the story the entire time, and all of you my poor neglected readers. The story will be completed, though I have to say, I'm not sure when my next update will be: real life can be pretty scary at times…

Since I haven't updated in forever, here's the last lines of the last chapter:

_Suddenly Carson sat up straight. What if he could find the syringe that had been used to deliver the poison, so he could test that? The killer would have tried to dispose it of course, but often the best way to do that was to put it in plain view; like where the infirmary disposed of hundreds of syringes!_

"_Kelly," Carson called out with excitement at his newest idea. "I need yer help. I think I've thought of a way ta find out what John was poisoned with."_

Chapter 7

"Carson, you said you had news?"

"Aye, I do, Elizabeth. I was able ta determine what John was poisoned with. Whoever wants ta get rid of John disposed of the syringe with the rest of the ones we use and by testing the residue of each one and cross checking what sort of medicines have been used recently, I was able, with the help of my team and after a bloody lot of hassle, ta find out what was used."

Carson paused for a moment gathering his thoughts before continuing. "It was actually quite clever of the killer. The toxin reacted with the other drugs in his system causin' the problems. Alone, it wouldn't have been that dangerous, but as it interacted with the opiates and antibiotics in John's system it became a proper bloody poison. We're lucky Rodney figured out that this was most likely another attempt on John's life as I would have continued givin' him all the other medications never realizin' they were part of the problem."

"Is John going to be okay?"

"Aye, I've begun to treat him and he's responding well to it and his fever is finally down. I believe he's out of danger, but there is something I'm concerned about and it's part of the reason I wanted ta talk with ye."

Elizabeth nodded to indicate she was listening as Carson gathered his thoughts before plunging in.

"As ye know, the human body heals best when the person is not stressed or worried and is in a calming environment. I'm afraid, however, that right now John is extremely agitated."

"Do you know what is causing his anxiety?" Elizabeth asked hesitantly already having a horrible idea of what it could be.

"Well part of his agitation was from the fever and toxin, which helped cause confusion. However, I'm afraid that due to an underlying cause even when we reduce his fever and the toxin is completely out of his system his recovery will still be encumbered."

Knowing before she even opened her mouth that she would hate the answer Elizabeth asked "And the underlying cause?"

Carson paused for a moment clearly just as happy about answering her question as she was to hear the answer. "In his nightmares he believes ye blame him not only for the jumper crash, but the explosion as well. He believes that ye think he tried to commit suicide and kill Rodney in the process. He's convinced ye plan on removing him from command and having him taken to the brig."

Elizabeth winced at that. The thought of placing John in the brig made her sick to the stomach. She could never put John in the same place that she had placed wraith, and it hurt her that he didn't know that, especially when it was her fault he didn't realize it.

Carson continued, "The fact the one of the few times he was slightly lucid he was in restraints and a guard was watching him gave credence to his fears and now his nightmares are even more vivid." Carson's voice became quieter, "he keeps begging for you to believe him that he's not a threat to Atlantis."

"In other words, I'm the underlying cause" Elizabeth muttered as she felt tears prick her eyes. Her decision to react in anger at the crash was having devastating consequences and it was John who was suffering for it. She had yelled at him in anger and had not believed him at first about the crash despite the fact he had earned her trust over and over again. The fact that she now knew the crash had been caused by someone trying to kill him did nothing to relieve her guilt. It hurt for Elizabeth to know she had a starring role in John's nightmares and that she was affecting his health in a negative way. For crying out loud, he thought she wanted to have him hauled out to the brig!

Feeling lower than scum she quietly asked, "So, what can we do?"

"Well," with an apologetic look he said, "I'm planning on movin' him to the isolation room now that we won't need ta monitor him quite as closely. I'll make sure Rodney secretly sets up the room in such a way that we won't have to worry about anyone overhearing anything in there and then when John's awake I'll have Rodney explain ta him what has happened and what's goin' on. Rodney and I'll make sure that John knows you trust him and don' consider him ta be a security risk. However, I believe it'd be best if for the time being ye didn' come to visit him. I'm afraid it'd agitate him and he needs to be in the least stressful environment possible. Once I'm sure he's up ta it ye can come see him, but for the moment I'm afraid it'd be harmful to John's health for him to see ye."

Elizabeth nodded slowly. She knew that it was hard for Carson to tell her this. She found herself swallowing back bile as she contemplated how she could hinder John's recovery simply by being in the same room as him.

"Alright, Carson. I'll stay away, but—" her voice broke and she swallowed before continuing, "as soon as you think he can handle me visiting let me know—there are some things I need to say to him."

Carson nodded; his entire body screaming his sympathy. Elizabeth turned sharply away. She didn't deserve his sympathy. She didn't deserve anyone's.

John felt like he was wrapped in a large comforting warm blanket. It was strange. His mind told him that there was something wrong, something that had been hanging over him like a dark cloud, and that he should be worried about it now. However, he couldn't force himself to give the slightest inkling of care to whatever it was he was supposed to be anxious about.

Comfortable and incredibly lethargic, John gazed at the world around him without registering anything he saw. He felt like he had when he was a kid and had just gotten well from being sick. He'd lay on his parent's bed with his mom softly combing her fingers through his hair.

He hadn't thought about it in years, but now as his mind wandered from one thought to another like a piece of driftwood in a pond, the memory was as clear as if had happened days ago instead of decades.

Slowly, John became aware of a pleasant brogue that must have been speaking for some time.

"Hmmmmm."

"Ah, John, how are ye?"

"Mmmm…good."

"No pain, nausea, tenderness, dizziness?"

"No."

"Good. Now do ye think yer up ta drinking some water?"

John contemplated the question intensely for a moment and then nodded his head slowly. "Sure."

Carson helped John sit up slowly and then placed a straw in his mouth. The slightly cool liquid felt like sweet honey coating his throat and John suddenly frowned as he realized he had no clear idea why his throat was so sore in the first place.

"Carson, what happened? I'm a bit confused by everything right now."

"Aye, that's entirely understandable. Well, I can give ye some of what happened, but Rodney threatened me with making it so that every time my screensaver comes on, it will play the Canadian national anthem unless I get him as soon as yer lucid."

"Oh, okay."

"Basically ye had a bit of a setback and weren't all here," a gentle way of saying John had been completely out of his mind with hallucinations and delusions John knew, "however, yer on the proper way ta be being one hundred percent now, so there's nothing for ye ta worry about."

John nodded slowly as he tried to process everything and make sense of the jumbled memories he had of the past few days.

"I'll be back soon John. I'm just going ta get Rodney. Ye may want ta try and sleep before I come back with him. As ye know, ye'll need all yer strength ta deal with him."

John smiled slightly at that and watched as Carson left the room. However, John didn't try to sleep at all. His mind was too busy fitting all the random pieces of his memory together. He remembered clearly the jumper crash and the tension between Elizabeth and himself.

Then there was the explosion. However, John's memories of that were extremely fuzzy. He knew Rodney had been with him and since Carson was going to get him he had to be okay, but John also had clear memories of being told that Rodney was dead and that it was his fault.

His stomach clenched at the thought and he repeated over and over to himself that Rodney was fine. Those would have had to be hallucinations or nightmares. Rodney had to be fine. Carson was getting him. Right?

Trying to think of something besides Rodney being a charred corpse as the heart monitor made sure that if anyone came into the room they'd know immediately he was stressed, he really looked around the room for the first time.

It was the isolation room and John furrowed his brow at the fact he was in it now. Usually, whenever he woke up in the infirmary he was always in the main part, but here he was in isolation. It didn't make sense. Was he contagious? Was there something he was missing?

Suddenly, the heart monitor tripled in speed as John considered a reason for why he was in isolation. He had at first thought it was part of his nightmares, but now he wondered if it wasn't much more likely to be real. Elizabeth thought the explosion was his fault and had put him under guard. He was probably lucky to not already be in the brig. Elizabeth didn't trust him. He remembered that clearly from before the explosion.

Suddenly, John realized that he wasn't getting enough oxygen. He tried to suck in air, but his body simply wasn't cooperating. His chest was heaving, but nothing was coming in.

Just as John felt like he was going to pass out, he felt something pressed against his face and sweet air brushed against his lips. A voice commanded him to take a deep breath and John forced himself to obey.

A few minutes later, John finally felt like he wasn't suffocating to death and looked up at the worried face of Teyla.

"John you need to breathe. Everything is fine. Just calm down alright."

John simply nodded as he still had the mask over his face and there was no way he was going to remove his supply of oxygen. Teyla continued to talk quietly to John as his heart rate finally returned to normal and his breaths came in evenly and quietly. John glanced around the room and to his relief saw no one else in the there.

Not wanting to beat around the bush, John pushed the mask to the side and said, "Teyla…I'm not sure if it was a dream…or…if it was real, but…" John paused for a moment and took a breath before saying in a rush, "Does Elizabeth and everyone else think I purposely caused the explosion?"

Teyla answered carefully, "Why would you think that?"

"Because I remember being in restraints and having marines guarding me."

Teyla sighed, "It's complicated, John, but the short answer to your question the answer is no Elizabeth does not think you caused it."

"But other people do?"

"Yes, but it is only because we haven't told anyone the whole story."

"I can believe that. You haven't told _me_ the whole story."

Teyla laughed quietly and John reveled in the musical sound. "I'm afraid I have strict orders from Rodney to let him tell you what happened, so he can revel you in his wonderful deductive reasoning. Just know that all of us, including Elizabeth, trust you and everything is going to be alright."

John nodded. Seriously. Who could disagree with Teyla? Not only was she the most truthful person he knew, she kicked butt with sticks.

Rodney entered the infirmary slowly. Carson had assured him that Sheppard was finally lucid, but that didn't completely remove Rodney's fear. He was willing to admit he was terrified at the idea of seeing John in the throes of one of the hallucinations Carson had told him John had had.

Rodney pushed the idea away though. John was fine! He was lucid. He was recovering. Carson had promised him that.

However, as Rodney entered the isolation room that Carson had moved John into for privacy and better security, his breath caught. John's eyes were closed and his skin seemed almost translucent. Rodney's eyes took in the bandages around his wrists were John had rubbed them raw against the restraints while trying to get away from the doctors trying to save his life. Rodney swallowed and he found himself overwhelmingly grateful that the restraints themselves were not there.

Cautiously Rodney stepped further into the room wondering if John had fallen asleep again since Carson had radioed him that John was awake.

"Hey" John said softly opening his eyes. 'I guess that answers that question' Rodney thought.

"It's…ummm…nice to see you…ummm…awake."

"Yeah."

There was silence for a moment and then John started to try and pull himself into a sitting position. His side however seemed to think that was one of John's more stupid ideas and he gave a grunt of pain.

"Here let me help you."

Before John could respond, Rodney was already reaching for the control of John's bed and raised it up and carefully plumped the pillow behind John's head. "There is that better?"

"Thanks, it is" replied John as they once again fell into an awkward silence. Rodney didn't know what to say to a weak John that couldn't even sit up without pain.

Breaking the silence, John asked, "So what's happening? Carson and Teyla have both explained some things too me, but I have to be honest I'm still a tad confused by everything right now."

"Yeah, that makes sense with the hallucinations and the…" clearing his throat as he realized he probably shouldn't have brought that up, Rodney continued, "so…a…yeah…ummm…well after you were getting better from the explosion we were talking and all of a sudden you started having difficulties in breathing. Everything just went down hill from there and the next thing I know Carson's saying—" Rodney swallowed before continuing, "—saying that you were dying."

John nodded obviously uncomfortable at the emotion Rodney was showing at the idea of John being dead.

Trying to get past the tension Rodney rushed on in his explanation. "Well I discovered through some truly amazing and outstanding searching that the explosion in the other room was set up to go off specifically when you activated the consol. In fact, it was set up so that only you could power it up, which of course made me suspicious. I mean I know your super gene is always activating things that no one else can get activated with an ease that is seriously just sickening, but on this, it really was just you that could activate and make it release the power that would cause the overload and therefore the explosion. I mean it was down to your DNA."

"My DNA? Seriously?!"

"Yeah, I almost missed it, but after I discovered that and knew what to look for, it wasn't too hard to figure out that the other 'accidents' weren't really accidents either and that someone on Atlantis must be…well…trying to kill you."

Rodney nervously studied John's face to make sure that the news wasn't causing John to lose it again or anything. Rodney wondered as he studied John's silent face if he should run and go get Carson. Yet, before he got up, John let out the breath he had been holding.

"Wow!" he said quietly. "So let me get this straight. The jumper crash, the explosion, and I'm guessing my sudden and unexplainable relapse were all because someone is trying to kill me?"

"Ah…yeah…pretty much."

"Okkkkaaaayyy? So what else do we know, like I don't know maybe whose trying to kill me and why?"

"Ummmm…we haven't quite figured either of those things out yet, which is the reason we are trying to have everyone think we're suspicious of you, so whoever it is doesn't simply disappear and then try to attack you later. However, I'm leaning on it being a scientist who's trying to kill you. I mean it took my superior intellect to find the evidence that revealed someone is after you, and it would take someone extremely talented to hide that information enough that I almost missed it, which means that the person has to be of a higher intellect than the average marine—" Rodney paused he took in John's raised eyebrow and quickly backtracked. "—Not that your marines are stupid or anything, I just mean that their not scientists; they don't specialize in higher brain power more like higher brawn power—" Rodney stopped as he realized he was just digging himself into a bigger and bigger hole.

"You think my soldiers aren't that smart?" John asked in a deceptively quiet voice.

"NO! I just think that they pay more attention to how strong they are for the most part. I mean you could have been MENSA and all, but most of your marines couldn't. Not that I'm saying that's a bad thing. There needs to be people to help protect those who have dedicated their lives to the pursuit of science and knowledge for the benefit of all humanity instead of pursuing fighting skills."

Rodney then noticed the twinkle in John's eyes that belied the serious expression on his face. "Oh you knew exactly what I meant all along!" Rodney said in a disgruntled voice.

"True," John said with a slight smirk, "But it was a lot of fun hearing you explain what you meant. You're just lucky none of my 'lowly' marines heard you."

Swallowing at the idea of being stuck alone in the gym with one of Sheppard's larger marines, Rodney quickly sought to change the subject by getting back on track. "So…uhhhh…yeah we think it's a scientist who is trying to kill you as to why however that is anyone's guess. I mean there are tons of people not on Atlantis that have countless reasons to want to kill you, but on Atlantis there aren't as many reasons. I mean, I suppose someone could have cracked over the ridiculous movies you always choose for movie night, but I highly doubt even that would be enough to get someone to want to kill you, beat you over the head with a remote, yes; kill no."

"Hey, I pick great movies!" John said in the same disgruntled tone Rodney had used before.

"Sure you do," Rodney said in a patronizing voice. "Whatever you say."

John smiled back and Rodney felt like sighing in contentment. Despite the fact John was still stuck on his back in the infirmary with someone out to kill him, their bantering together let Rodney, for at least the moment, feel like everything was going to be alright.

……………………………………………………………………………………………………....

"So, Rodney explained why we have the soldiers guarding you, right?"

"Yep. He made sure I knew that all of you trust me, and that the soldiers are there to keep me safe and ensure that whoever is trying to kill me doesn't know that we're on to them yada yada ya. In fact, I also heard that speech from Carson and Teyla, so Ronon if you want to give me your own speech…"

"No, I think I'll pass," Ronon said with a grin as he grabbed the Jell-O from John's partially eaten tray.

"I appreciate that. So, how has the military been taking this?"

"Actually, there pretty much all behind you. It's only some of the new recruits who doubt you, but they don't dare to be loud about their suspicions as everybody else is ready to deck them if they do."

"Yeah, I knew there were some recruits who weren't too happy with me, and this certainly isn't helping my image."

"No, not really."

"How's Lorne doing? Is anyone giving him any problems?"

"No problems. Though, I can tell you he isn't happy about the fact he has to act like he doesn't trust you. It's bothering him a lot."

John nodded. Many people thought Ronon didn't notice how people felt about things, but the truth was he was extremely observant and knowing how someone felt about something could save your life someday.

"I know it would be too suspicious if you had Lorne come here to talk to me, but could you make sure he knows that he's doing the right thing, and I don't hold any ill will towards him."

"Sure."

They fell into a comfortable silence and soon John found himself drifting off to sleep with the reassurance that his team had his back no matter what.

………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………

To be continued….

A/N: So…I know that some things in this chapter are a little off, but as I said if I waited until it all actually made sense I would never finish the story with everything else I'm doing, so please don't be too critical of it all…pretty please ;)

Okay, I know after neglecting you for so long I shouldn't push this, but I'm really asking for reviews for two reasons. A) Since it has been so long I'd like to know if anyone is still interested in the story and B) if I find that a lot of people are still interested it will definitely motivate me to push aside real life to write…so please guys review!


	8. Chapter 8

A/N: Sorry it has taken so long to update. I finally finished another quarter of school and am able to do something non-academic related. =)

A/N 2: Okay, since it has been sooooo long since I last updated here is a quick summary of what has happened so far:

_John and Lorne were training some of the new recruits on Atlantis in flying jumpers when John's jumper crashed. John knew it wasn't his fault, but Elizabeth thought it was at first. Then, right before she was going to tell him that she did believe him, there was a power spike on Atlantis. John and Rodney went to figure out what was happening in a lab and while they were in the lab there was an explosion. _

_John was hurt badly and had to have surgery. Afterwards, John and Rodney were talking together in the infirmary when suddenly John started having trouble breathing! Rodney freaks out and then everyone is trying to figure out what is going on as John's condition worsens and everyone thinks he might die. Rodney in an effort to get his mind off of things is searches through data on the explosion and comes to a startling and terrifying conclusion: It was NOT an accident! _

_He lets everyone know that someone is trying to kill John and they realize that John probably was poisoned. Still, they don't want to tip off whoever is trying to kill John that they are on to him and they want to lull him into a false sense of security so they make everyone think that John is under suspicion for the explosion. Carson finally figures out exactly what John was poisoned with and he slowly begins to recover. John talks with Rodney and discovers exactly what has been going on and that leads us to where we are now…_

Chapter 8:

Rodney, with his laptop in his lap, sat by John's bed as John quietly slept. Supposedly Rodney was working on trying to figure out which of his men were the most likely to be trying to kill Sheppard, and if anyone asked that is exactly what he would tell them he was doing, but mainly he found himself watching John as he slept. For so long, whenever Rodney had seen John 'sleeping' John had also been burning with fever and crying out as pain and terrors tormented him. So, to see John sleeping peacefully without fever ravaging his body was a sight that Rodney was having a hard time looking way from.

Although, it had been a week from when the fever had finally broken and Rodney was ready to see John lucid and conscious again. Carson said it was a good thing that John was sleeping most of the time; that his body desperately needed the rest, but Rodney couldn't help wishing that John was already awake and one hundred percent.

Yeah, so patience wasn't his strong suit.

Sighing, Rodney looked back to his computer. On the screen he had the list of names of all his scientists, but he had already gone over every man and woman with a fine tooth comb and though he had been reminded of how imbecilic many of them were, he was no closer to figuring out which one of them could be responsible for the attacks on John.

Setting down his computer, Rodney stood up and stretched. His back cracking after all the hours he had been sitting in the hard backed chair that Carson had placed in John's room.

He glanced at his watch and was reminded just how much time had passed since he had last eaten—and more importantly—drunken coffee. He looked down at John one more time, watching his chest gently rise and fall as he took in life-giving air. Rodney's mind flashed back to when he had seen John gasping for air after his surgery. John had supposedly been fine, but then he hadn't been able to breathe. John had been talking as coherently as he ever did, but then the next thing Rodney knew, John's every word had been a struggle.

Shaking his head to remove the images Rodney found himself sitting back down by John's bed and grabbing his laptop again. He just couldn't find the will power to leave John right now, the images of him going from fine to dying in a heartbeat too fresh in his mind.

Opening his laptop he once again began to compare the skills of his scientists with those that would have been needed in the attempts on John's life hoping that he would have a breakthrough and finally discover who had tried to kill his best friend.

SGA

_John found himself in the middle of a dark, swirling mist, so thick he couldn't see his hand in front of his face. He felt his heart rate speed up; he hated not being able to see, to be about control, and to have no idea what he could do. 'Think John' he muttered to himself as he tried to figure out what he should do to get out of the oppressive mist. Suddenly, he saw Elizabeth standing in front of him looking stern and angry and lit seemingly by a sharp light emitting from inside her. _

_Swallowing, John tried to say "Elizabeth". His voice caught and he tried again trying to ignore his apprehension _

"_Elizabeth"._

"_Colonel Shepherd"._

"_Ummm...do you know where we are?"_

"_Colonel Shepherd, I expected better from you!"_

"_What?"_

"_I mean Rodney told me that you had horrible direction, but as the military commander on Atlantis I expected you to at least try to be responsible but if you can't even keep track of where you are how can you possibly be responsible for all of Atlantis?"_

_"Wait…what? I have no idea how I got here, so how could I know where we are?"_

"_Exactly! You should know these things. If you were truly worthy to be commander you would know this!"_

_John felt his head spin and his headache flare as he tried to understand how not knowing where he was, meant he shouldn't be the commander of Atlantis, but before his sluggish thinking could sort it out, he was being bombarded with accusations._

"_You're such a failure and violent man! We're supposed to be on a scientific expedition, yet in the first few days you were on Atlantis, you kill the man who was meant to be the commanding officer and wake the wraith; starting a war! Then you kill 50 men from a nation that could have been an ally if you hadn't woken the wraith! I hate having you on Atlantis! In fact, you know what; I think I'm going to have you removed from Atlantis."_

"_What?!" John said in shock and horror as his confused and muddled mind tried to translate what exactly she said as it couldn't be what it sounded like._

"_Goodbye" she said as she began to drift away her light fading with her._

"_Wait!" John shouted terrified at the idea of being left along in the mist that seemed to be suffocating him. John tried to follow her in the hope that no matter how disappointed and mad she might be with him she could lead him out of…well wherever here is._

_Yet, she disappeared before he got close as it felt like he was wading through mud—sadly an experience he actually had had. He felt this panic growing and oxygen didn't seem to be filling his lungs, what little vision he had began to fade, his heart was hammering in his chest and he felt like he was about to collapse._

John jackknifed up in his bed in the infirmary causing his side to scream in pain as sweat poured off his body and his chest heaved trying to draw in life giving air. Trying to calm himself he focused on he repetitive something sounds of the various monitors in the room.

John felt his panic slowly recede as he took in the fact he wasn't in the mist, but was safe on Atlantis. The room was softly illuminated by the medical equipment and John found himself thankful for their light. He sighed and carefully lay back trying to ease the pain in his side.

John glanced around and saw to his surprise that he had been so caught up in his own fears and anxieties that he had entirely missed the presence of Carson who he now realized was talking to him in a soothing voice as he injected, what John assumed was, pain killers into his IV port.

"Care ta tell me what this dream was about?"

"Not really," John replied tiredly already trying to block the very memory of it.

"Ack, I figured as much."

They both fell silent as Carson got John a cup of cool, soothing water. As John drank it, he found his mind considering the present tension between him and Elizabeth. It was true that he had been told that Elizabeth no longer thought he was at all responsible for the jumper crash or subsequent explosion, and after a lot of badgering he had even discovered that the reason she hadn't been to see him was Carson's doing, for as Carson put it, "Seeing Elizabeth right now would cause ta much stress for ye, just know she's on yer side and now eat the broth!"

Yet, that had been a few days ago and there was no way John was going to leave things at that and let people baby him any longer. He needed to face Elizabeth himself. He knew that until it was resolved one way or the other there was no way he'd stop having nightmares about it and he desperately desired to not wake up in the middle of the night with a racing heart and a sweat covered pillow as adrenalin flooded his system at the idea of Elizabeth locking him in the brig.

"Carson."

"Yeah, John?"

"If Elizabeth is willing to see me, I want to be able to see her."

"John that's not such a great idea. Ye'r still weak and that would be a lot of stress put on your system. I think ye should wait a we bit longer."

"No, Carson. I'm tired of you treating me like I can't handle it. I can handle it," John said with a firm look meeting Carson's gaze head on. After a moment, he added with a wry smile, "besides, I think the stress of not just talking with her is a lot worse than just getting it over with and talking to her."

"Are ye sure John?"

"Yes."

Sighing, Carson muttered, "Stubborn fool," not particularly caring that John could hear him. "Fine, I'll let her know tamorrow. Now, try ta sleep."

John nodded. His body was exhausted and winning even the small battle with Carson had sapped what little energy he had. John felt his eyes close as the adrenalin left his body and he fell asleep with a quiet brogue telling him everything would be all right.

SGA

Elizabeth took a deep breath before entering the room John was in. She hadn't seen him awake and cognizant since he had run off to the lab and she hoped that John would listen to what she had to say, not that she had listened to him, her guilty consciousness reprimanded.

Elizabeth knew John was aware of the fact that she no longer doubted him, but Elizabeth desperately wanted to apologize to him and let him know that even before the power spike she had realized she trusted him and believed him, not that that lessened her culpability, but it might make him slightly more open to listening to her pleas of forgiveness.

"Hi, John," she said with a false calm as she unclenched her sweaty palms. "Carson says you're getting stronger."

John, who had tensed when she entered the room and looked as if he would have stood at attention if only his body would have let him, replied evenly enough, "I am. In fact, I'm ready to get out of here."

Nodding, Elizabeth chose not to comment on the fact that both of them knew Carson thought John was in no way ready to be released and this was the first day that he had even been allowed to sit up for longer than an hour at a time. Instead she asked, unable to completely hide the waver in her voice, "May I talk with you for a moment?"

"Sure" John said slowly clearly bracing himself for what Elizabeth was going to say.

Wanting to release the tension that was almost palpable in the room, Elizabeth plunged in. "I'm sorry John." John's eyes widened clearly surprised by her apology and Elizabeth felt her guilt grow at his astonishment and rushed forward unable to look him in the eye, "I should have trusted you and believed you from the beginning and I know nothing I say can excuse the fact I didn't, but I need to say sorry and let you know you are the finest military leader that could be here and I'm beyond grateful that it is you I have been serving with these past years."

Raising her eyes to see John's face she could not tell what emotions lay behind his mask, but felt his piercing hazel eyes penetrate her and she forced herself to continue. "I know you probably won't believe this and I don't blame you for that in the slightest, but I want you to know, I chose to believe you about the jumper crash even before we knew someone was trying to kill you. Actually, it was at our meeting right before the power spike that I realized you've never lied to me before or given me reason to doubt you, and I needed to trust you then, late though it was."

She paused for a moment taking a deep breath and then went on, feeling the words began to flow out of her as if in a torrential river. "John, I'm so sorry for doubting you in the beginning. You deserve my trust and I didn't give it to you. You have done so much not only for Atlantis, but me personally, yet I refused to believe what you told me. Not only that; I didn't make sure you were okay after the crash. I should have sent you to the infirmary immediately to get checked out, but I didn't; instead, I got angry with you and you almost died because of that choice!"

John who had been silent up to that point broke in, "Elizabeth, I know I should have gone to the infirmary, yet _I_ didn't want to, so _I_ didn't go. That was my choice, my decision, my mistake, not yours. I'm not a child and it's not your job to make sure the military commander of this base such as he is, goes to get medical attention if he needs it."

"No, John, though I won't deny you should have gone to the infirmary on your own and I certainly expect you to do so in the future if there is the slightest chance you're hurt, but I know I am also at fault. If it was anyone else under me I would have made sure they went to the infirmary and got checked over and I know one of the reasons you chose not to go was my actions after the crash."

Unable to deny her last point John looked away and Elizabeth feeling just short of pond-scum forced herself to go on. "John, you have to understand, when the jumper crashed I was terrified that you had died. Until you opened the jumper I wondered if after all the suicide missions and close calls you've had, you had just died in a training exercise on Atlantis. That—that idea made me so angry and since there was no apparent reason for it, I automatically assumed you had been showing off and that very idea made me furious. I couldn't stand the thought that you had risked your life to beat Major Lorne in a race."

Elizabeth took a deep breath. "I'm sorry John for not believing you and getting angry at you, you deserved better than that. You have proven yourself worthy of trust more times than I can count and I apologize for not trusting you this time. I know it might not mean much, but let me assure you that next time I will believe you from the beginning. Can you forgive me?"

Elizabeth held her breath waiting for John's response, hoping that she'd be forgiven while at the same time knowing she didn't deserve it.

Slowly, clearly not wanting to give her a flippant answer, John said meeting her eyes, "I couldn't very well expect you to forgive the mistakes I make if I'm not willing to do the same for you, so yes, Elizabeth, I forgive you."

Elizabeth felt her face break into a smile as the weight she had been carrying melted away. Despite the fact John was still in the infirmary and someone was trying to kill John, Elizabeth felt her entire outlook on life brighten. She still felt guilty, but knowing that she hadn't permanently injured her friendship with John made her heart feel like singing. Though she was sure it would not be fixed right away, she knew that this was the most important step to removing the tension and doubt between them and when they were together Elizabeth knew they could face whatever was coming.

In many ways, John's thoughts echoed hers. Armed with the knowledge Elizabeth had decided to believe him regardless of how it looked even before it had been discovered that the jumper crash had been attempt to kill him, made John feel like he could do anything.

Ever since the crash, his mind had constantly been reminding him that no commanding officer would ever trust him. He had only needed to look at his past for a plethora of examples. From North Korea to Afghanistan, from the U.S. to Antarctica, he had plenty of occasions were for one reason or another his CO totally brushed him off, ignoring what he had to say, disbelieving him, and in a few cases outright trying to make his life miserable. On Atlantis, he had finally begun to feel at home and not think that everyone was constantly waiting for him to screw up, but ever since the crash his mind had been hammering home the fact that everyone only saw him as a screw up.

Yet, Elizabeth said she trusted him. She had chosen to trust him despite what the evidence implied. Sure, she hadn't originally believed him, and he still wasn't entirely happy about that fact, but when it came down to it, she had made the decision to trust him and that's what mattered in John's book.

He had learned from his experience with Rodney after Rodney had blown up a solar system that he couldn't hold grudges against his teammates—his family. It had almost destroyed both Rodney and he when he did, and John didn't want to make the same mistake with Elizabeth.

John was interrupted from his thoughts as Elizabeth's radio buzzed, making him remember that he was bereft of his own. He listened as she told whoever that she would be there shortly. She started heading towards the door, but stopped and turned around coming back towards John.

"Listen, John, I know that Rodney has told you what we know about whoever is trying to kill you, and I want to ask that you'll be careful. John, I hate how close we always come to losing you and I—I can't risk losing you again. I know you want to catch whoever is after you, and I do to, but, just—just don't take any unnecessary risks, please."

John swallowed at the thick emotion that he saw in Elizabeth's face even as he knew his answer wasn't exactly what she would want to hear. "Elizabeth, I can't stop being who I am and I don't want to risk anyone else getting hurt in his attempts on my life."

"I know, just—please be careful. Everyone on Atlantis needs you—I need you."

"I'll do my best, Elizabeth."

Elizabeth gave him a searching look before slowly leaving the room. John sighed. He promised Elizabeth would do his best to stay safe, but there was no way he was going to allow whoever was after him a chance to hurt anyone else on Atlantis.

SGA

It was three days since John had first talked with Elizabeth and though he had tried to be patient both with Carson and his slowly healing body, the more time that passed the more worried he became that the person would strike again and someone else would get caught in the crossfire, which led to the current argument he was having with Carson.

"John, there is no way I am releasing ye to yer room! Ye are in no condition to be on your own!"

"I wouldn't be on my own, a guard would be posted at the door and you and the rest of my team could check on me periodically, and I'd have my radio if I needed help for any reason."

"John yer body has been through a lot, for crying out loud right after ye had major surgery ye were poisoned!"

"I'm doing a lot better. You said it yourself that I'm on the mend."

"On the mend yes, mended no."

"Come on Carson, I'll just be lying in my bed the same as I'm doing here."

"Aye, but here not only am I closer by, but there is also proper medical equipment in case something goes wrong."

"Doc, listen nothing's going to go wrong."

"Famous _last_ words."

"Alright, Carson, I'll admit I'm still not feeling 100%—" at Carson's snort John continued "—okay so it's more like 75%" Carson snorted at that as well and John gave him a disgruntled look before going on, "anyhow, under _normal_ circumstances, I might—might, mind you, think it might be a good idea for me to stay in the infirmary for a bit longer, but be that as it may, these are _not_ normal circumstances and I have no intention of putting the lives or health of others at risk by staying here. Seriously, people who are inured and medical personnel are the people I least want to get caught in the crossfire if the guy or gal comes after me again."

"But John, we have ye in private room now and a guard watching ye, so the risk to others is minimal."

"Not minimal enough. Carson, no offence, but the infirmary is NOT the most secure location and I will not risk other people's lives just so I can be under closer medical supervision, not when the risk would be considerably less in my room."

"Aye, but keep in mind the perpetrator has only done things when the risk to others was minimal. I'm afraid that if ye're in yer quarters he will be more likely ta strike and John yer body needs rest. I'm not sure how well it will cope if another 'accident' occurs right now. If I release ye to yer quarters the odds of another attack against ye go up and yer body does not need ta deal with that right now."

"Carson, I understand what you're saying, but this perpetrator may be getting desperate and be ready to take bigger risks, risks that could endanger the lives of the others in this infirmary and I will not say here and take that risk. So here's your choice Carson you can either let me go to my room or you can restrain my, because unless you do I'll get there myself against your orders."

"Yer a bloody fool ye know! If ye want ta risk yer life and health, don' let me keep ye. I'll release ye ta yer room, but yer going ta follow my directions ta the letter or ye'll be back here even if I do have ta use restraints."

"Thanks Carson," John replied with a smile, carefully collapsing against the pillows. Arguing with Carson took a lot of energy and energy was something John was in short supply of. In fact, John was willing to admit to himself that if it wasn't for the risk his remaining in the infirmary was causing others, he would have no intention of getting released yet.

As much as he disliked being in the infirmary, John wasn't a fool and knew there were times when he needed to be in the infirmary, so he could get back up to optimum health quicker. This would normally have been one of the times, were he whined about being stuck in the infirmary more out of habit and to see the look of incredulity on Carson's face, not to actually get out. Yet, John felt his stomach turn at the idea of his assailant attacking him in the infirmary were so many others were at risk. Not just any others, John added mentally, but the sick, wounded, and medical personnel. There was no way John was going to let himself getting a bit better care put those people at risk.

So, John carefully hid the exhaustion and pain to make sure Carson didn't know how bad he was feeling. Although, John thought wryly as he heard the Scott muttering to himself, Carson probably had an excellent idea at just how miserable John's body was still feeling.

Sighing, John closed his eyes for just a moment and to his surprise when he opened them Carson was hovering over him with a look of concern on his face. "John are ye sure yer up ta this?"

"Of course, I am!" John said disgruntled, ignoring the fact he had dozed off for a moment. "I just got bored waiting for you. So, what are your rules this time?"

"For one, the only time ye're ta walk is when yer going ta yer bathroom and then back ta bed. Yer not ta take a shower unless someone is with ye and if ye have the slightest problem, yer to bloody well contact someone immediately!"

"Understood" John said with a mock salute.

"Aye, it better be. Now remember ta take yer medicine and follow the rules I always give ye or ye'll be back here before ye can blink."

At the look of worry and apprehension on Carson's face, John said seriously, "I'll do everything you said, Carson. Don't worry about it. I'll be good."

Sighing Carson said, "Aye, I'm sure ye will. Just remember if it wasn't for these…circumstances…there's no way ye'd be back in yer quarters, so don' push yerself."

John nodded and then looked up as Ronon walked over. "You my escort?" he asked with a grin.

"Yeah, you ready?"

"Carson?"

"Aye, ye can go. Just remember what I said."

SGA

Ronon pushed John in the wheelchair, John had reluctantly agreed to sit in, as quickly as he could while still providing a smooth journey. He knew John hated being in wheelchairs and having people see him in them on the best of days and this certainly wasn't the best of days.

Not only was John being released to his room much sooner than was best for his still weak body, but he had to deal with everyone on Atlantis being led to believe he was under suspicion. Hence Ronon's haste as his team leader and friend had to force himself not to cringe away from every glance that went his way on this short trip. Whether it was suspicion or pity, John hated it. Though he did hide it well; Ronon could only tell by the way John tensed and his jaw tightened every time they passed someone in the corridors.

Ronon knew that John just wanted to get to the relative safety of his room and away from everyone's eyes, but Ronon forced himself not to break into a run and race John back to his room. Not that they hadn't had wheelchair races before, when Carson wasn't around, but there was no way Ronon was going to risk it right now. Carson was already on edge just from releasing John, and Ronon knew that John's body wouldn't be able to take the abuse if they accidently ran into anything or were run into. So, even though he knew John wanted him to speed, he was going at a sedate pace back to John's room.

When they finally arrived at John's quarters, Ronon carefully helped John collapse on his bed. It was always peculiar for Ronon when he saw his team leader and friend like this. Normally, John was always ready to jump into action and was vibrant with energy though he always claimed a natural laziness. Ronon knew that John hated looking weak and people feeling pity for him, which Ronon could totally relate to.

Ronon saw John hide a grimace of pain and grabbed the painkillers Carson had sent with him to have John take after the trip. Carson hadn't even bothered to give them to John as he knew he wouldn't take them. Instead he had passed it off too Ronon with orders to have John take them if John showed the least amount of pain.

With the bottle of water he had grabbed, Ronon simply held them out to John saying "here".

John opened his eyes, took in what Ronon was holding and gave a long suffering sigh before he took them and muttered "e tu Brutus?"

"Huh?" Ronon questioned as that was an earth expression he had not encountered yet.

"It's from a play written by a famous English playwright based on a Roman Caesar who—never mind, it means you're going against me to."

"Oh, yeah. Well, Carson's way scarier than you when it comes to medical things. Besides, he's even worse than normal right now thanks to you getting out of the infirmary early and someone being after you."

"Well, he'll have to live with it."

"Just like you have to live with taking these pills."

John gave Ronon a disgruntled look and then weary with exhaustion swallowed the pills and downed half the bottle of water.

Worn out, John screwed the lid back on the bottle and let it drop onto the bed, not bothering to place it on his nightstand as he closed his eyes.

Ronon shook his head slightly worried at John's obvious exhaustion. "Hey" he said getting John to open his eyes again, "Carson told me to tell you someone will be in to check on you in a few hours, but if you need anything or have any problems radio for help. Oh and he sort of hinted that if he finds out you needed something, but didn't call anyone, he'd take you back to the infirmary so fast your head would spin."

"Wow," John said with a slight grin, "Carson really is riled up right now."

"Yep and its all your fault."

John's grin got wider at that and Ronon felt an answering grin form on his face. Once again John's eyes drifted closed and Ronon hesitated in leaving the room. It just didn't seem right to leave John alone since he was so weak.

However, John's eyes squinted up at him with ire after a moment. "I don't need a babysitter!"

Nodding at John's request for him to leave the room, Ronon left slowly, pushing away his unease. John would be fine he told himself firmly. There simply was no other option.

To Be Continued...

A/N: Please review and let me know what you think!!! It always encourages me to put aside what I have to do and write more!!!!


End file.
